Season 7 – Episode 18 – “Requiem”

Episode Summary:

President Bartlet and his current and former staffers come together for Leo’s funeral.

Script:

Previously on The West Wing: America has lost a giant tonight and I’ve lost a friend.
He died.
Leo’s dead.
Undecideds all over California are driving to the polls right now.
For those of you who have not yet voted it is the only thing that should matter when you go to the polls tonight.
I am not naming a new running mate now.
Leo was on the ballot.
If I win, he wins.
– We just won Oregon.
– Get the president-elect on the phone.
I wanna congratulate him.
I am the resurrection and the life, saith the Lord.
He that believeth in me, though he were dead, yet shall he live.
And whosoever liveth and believeth in me shall never die.
I know that my Redeemer liveth and that he shall stand at the latter day upon the Earth.
And though this body be destroyed, yet shall I see God whom I shall see for myself.
And mine eyes shall behold and not as a stranger, for none of us liveth to himself and no man dieth to himself.
For if we live, we live unto the Lord.
And if we die, we die to the Lord.
Whether we live, therefore, or die, we are the Lord’s.
Blessed are the dead who die in the Lord, so saith the Spirit for they rest from their labors.
The Lord be with you.
Let us pray.
Almighty God, we thank thee that in thy great love thou hast fed us with the spiritual food and drink of the Body and Blood of thy Son, Jesus Christ.
and has given unto us a taste of thy heavenly banquet.
Grant that this Sacrament may be unto us a comfort in affliction and a pledge of our inheritance in that kingdom where there is no death, neither sorrow nor crying.
But the fullness of joy with all thy saints through Jesus Christ our Savior.
Amen.
Give rest, O Christ, to thy servant with thy saints where sorrow and pain are no more, neither sighing, but life everlasting.
Thou only art immortal, the creator and maker of mankind and we are mortal, formed of the earth, and unto earth shall we return.
For so thou didst ordain when thou createdst me, saying: “Dust thou art, and unto dust shalt thou return.
” All go down to the dust, yet even at the grave we make our song.
Alleluia, alleluia, alleluia.
Give rest, O Christ, to thy servant with thy saints where sorrow and pain are no more, neither sighing, but life everlasting.
Into thy hands, O merciful Savior we commend thy servant Leo.
Acknowledge, we humbly beseech thee, a sheep of thine own fold a lamb of thine own flock, a sinner of thine own redeeming.
Receive him into the arms of thy mercy into the blessed rest of everlasting peace and into the glorious company of the saints in life.
Amen.
Let us go forth in the name of Christ.
Thanks be to God.
Hey.
I’m so sorry for your loss.
The president invited some people over later, after Arlington.
– C.
J.
Told us.
– You got a pretty busy schedule.
– We’ll move things around.
– Speaker’s race is heating up.
– How many are in it now? – Three, if you count Marino.
– Two and a half.
– What’s wrong with Marino? – Nothing a hairweave can’t cure.
– World needs welterweights.
– My condolences.
– Thank you.
And Congressman Fields wants five minutes this afternoon.
We’re from neighboring districts.
When I was mayor I practically camped outside his office.
Last whip count, Fields had a slight edge over Sellner.
If we can solidify that Sellner’s got a few whips to crack too, if you’re sitting with Fields.
– I need five minutes with Sellner.
– Marino? If this were a game show, this is when we’d hand him his lovely parting gift.
– I’ll see you at Arlington.
– All right, Barry.
I’ll talk to you later on.
We should be careful about meddling in a speakership race.
I served in the House.
It would just tick off the loser and anyone who supported him.
Fields moved back to Texas to help us with the campaign for three months.
Sellner voted with the Republicans on vouchers, on tort reform.
You wanna keep your oar out of the water.
One of them’s gonna be the speaker.
You’re gonna have to work with him.
We’re inundated with calls about who you’ll name Vice President resumes for Cabinet and sub-Cabinet positions.
– That’s what I spoke to Barry about.
– Barry Goodwin? I asked if he was willing to do it, and he said yes.
– To head the transition team? – Sir, we’re ready for you.
He’s got some great ideas, Josh.
Find a few minutes and have him fill you in.
That was a beautiful service.
I’m just waiting for the press outside to pack up and leave.
– You coming to Arlington? – Is that you asking or somebody else? Relax, Charlie.
Tell C.
J.
I’m not coming.
I’d like to, but I have other commitments.
Sure.
I’ll walk with you.
I don’t think a picture of us makes the front page of the New York Times.
Do you? I told Mallory that we’d go by her mother’s house for a few minutes.
She seemed okay, given everything.
Did you see Toby in the back? Yeah.
He would have hated this, don’t you think? He would have been mortified that we’d gone to all that trouble.
Jed? We got in here yesterday, so we haven’t had a chance to get organized yet.
Hello? – Hey, thanks.
– Hi.
Thanks, everybody.
Thanks.
Please.
All right, stop that now.
– Go on.
Everybody back to work.
– We don’t get into the West Wing until after the inaugural, but we can see it out the window.
Dave’s gonna keep an eye out.
Make sure nobody makes off with FBI files before we get in there.
This is you.
This’ll do.
The director of the National Gallery called.
If you wanna pick out stuff for the walls.
– You got my messages? – I’d vet those first.
– Figure out who you need to respond to.
– Oh, no, that’s okay.
I’ll do it.
How many do we have so far this morning? About 1200.
Let me know when you get through the A’s.
Thanks.
What do you think about Swain for Defense Secretary? Senator Swain of Rhode Island? Yeah.
Service academies love him.
Shook things up as Secretary of the Navy.
– He’s a Republican.
– Bipartisanship would kill us? It’s gonna be seen as a political grab.
We offer a Cabinet position to a Republican who can’t possibly take it? Barry thought it was a good idea.
Well, Barry is wrong.
Are you unhappy with Barry as head of the transition team? I’m unhappy with him as de facto Congressional liaison.
There’s an advantage to letting him handle the transition: It keeps you from having to say no to those people that you’re gonna need when you’re Chief of Staff.
– Congressman Fields is here.
– Thanks, I’ll be right with him.
I served in the House for 6 years.
I think I can handle 10 minutes alone with one of my closest friends in Congress.
Thank you, sir.
– Weren’t the flowers gorgeous? – Yeah.
Leo loved gardenias.
We should try to catch up on calls before this thing starts.
Daley, Hutchinson.
See if Ambassador Klein is still awake in Berlin.
– How you doing? – Oh, okay.
Sorry, I’m losing stuff today.
I’m fine.
You? Fine.
I’m a little early.
What time’s it start? – Four.
– So two and a half hours.
– More like three.
– I wanted to make sure I wasn’t late.
– That was a nice service.
– Beautiful.
– Majority Leader had his fly down.
– Did he? I was gonna tell him, except I never really liked him, so I decided it was okay.
I’m sorry I didn’t catch you at the cathedral.
Don’t worry.
You were swamped.
Everyone thinks I have something to say.
I’m not coming up with anything.
You don’t have to.
Actually, I came early because I was hoping we could get a minute to talk before the masses descend.
– Yeah? Me too.
Really? – Shoot.
– Me first? Why do I have to go first? I don’t know.
I just You Okay.
Well, you know when I came over Wednesday night and it was late and we didn’t really talk, we just? I have a vague recollection.
– Did that make you feel bad? – Bad in a In a what? – You know, used.
– For my body? – Something like that.
– I’ll work through it.
– You sure? – It happens.
Women want me.
It’s just, I know we have a lot to talk about and I don’t wanna leapfrog any of it, but it was kind of wonderful to just – Not talk.
– Not even a little.
You wanna do it again tonight, don’t you? I really do.
I’ll leave the door open.
Congressman Fields.
Wonderful service this morning.
– Not so much a funeral as a celebration.
– It’s true.
– Makes me sad I’ll be missing my own.
– And by just a few days.
– Thanks, Otto.
– Sir.
– Mr.
President.
– Mr.
Speaker.
Hey, I can skip pages on the calendar if you can.
– I’m a few pages short.
– How’s that? I’m 10 votes down.
Sellner’s pulled ahead.
Well, last whip count had you at 91.
Sellner can’t have more than 85.
Peeled away Hughes and Fraser.
That brought him six more Blue Dogs and Schreibman’s wavering.
So six of our conservative members get to swing the whole election? Sellner’s telling everybody you’re too liberal, and I’d be a White House lackey.
Well, more like the other way around.
Half of my agenda’s gonna come from you: Lobbying reform, the Medicare expansion Well, now, I need something from you.
Segal flips if you ask him.
Blinken, Carney.
Plus you got at least five votes on the Hispanic caucus.
I know how it’ll look: President-elect wading into a leadership battle bail out an old friend.
– That’s how it’ll look.
You give Sellner that gavel, and he’ll drop it smack-dab right in the middle of your legislative skull.
Hey, look at you.
– An office with your name on it.
– Yeah, got a door and everything.
How’s that feel? I never got above a cubicle here.
Feels great.
Not that it’s gonna last long.
New sheriff’s coming to town.
You talk to Josh? I’m sure he’d be happy to What about you? Josh gonna carve out a little corner for you? Well, lots on his plate right now.
Anything short of Secretary of Commerce you gotta challenge him to a duel.
– Pistols or sabers? I’m serious.
He really hasn’t talked to you yet? Election day was only three days ago.
It’s complicated.
You want me to slap him around a bit? I can round up a few guys from the old neighborhood.
People are starting to gather in the lobby for the thing.
– Josh really hasn’t asked you to – Come on, Charlie.
Buy a girl a drink.
I’m not saying it wouldn’t be great to have Fields.
It’s risky to monkey around with elections.
Risky is not the word.
Blackjack is risky.
Stock picking is risky.
Yeah, well, I’m more of a credit union kind of guy.
Any scenario loses us allies.
If you can conceivably work with Sellner If we’re annexing a small Latin American dictatorship, sure.
Yeah? – Thanks.
– Congressman Sellner.
Mr.
President-elect.
I like the sound of that.
Couple too many syllables, but I’ll take it.
– Josh.
– Good to see you, Congressman.
Wonderful service this morning.
More of a celebration, really.
Never thought of it that way.
I’m gaining.
You control enough votes to put him in the speakership but you’re not gonna.
We’re not doing any kind of whip count.
We’re steering clear of that.
Let’s talk about issues.
I won’t take orders from the White House.
I won’t have the caucus to the left, but you’ll know what I’m doing and bill of yours dies, blame me.
My bigger concern is that a bill might not make it to the House floor.
– Try me.
– Okay.
Lobbying reform.
H.
R.
One.
First bill I want you to take up.
We both know my best chance to pass something is right out of the gate.
You wanna waste that chance on a process issue banning martini lunches? I wanna ban all political donations by registered lobbyists.
They’ll turn around, demand clients write checks And a ban on lobbyists directing contributions from their clients.
Lobbyists would have to argue on the merits of their bills.
I could argue it’s unconstitutional.
Money equals speech.
No, we don’t allow bribery.
That’s speech through money too.
Which must be why you voted for lobbying reform when Fields introduced it three years ago.
When we were in the minority, I did.
– Now we’re in the majority.
– By four seats.
We finally have a fundraising advantage.
Now’s not the time to switch the rules.
And how does a process issue help any of us to We shut out insurance-industry lobbyists, it helps us pass health-care reform.
If we shut out drug-company lobbyists, it helps us pass a real prescription-drug benefit.
This bill lets us pass every other bill.
Well, you can push for it.
I’ll do my best to block it.
May the best man win.
If you end up as speaker, sure.
We’re not implying that I’ll have a majority to protect.
If I end up as speaker, that is.
You want me to blow our chance to hold onto a Democratic House.
First one in 10 years first bill out of the gate.
I won’t do it.
Mr.
President-elect.
I hope we’ll have the chance to work together.
Set up a meeting with Congressman Marino.
You realize that Marino’s got, like, three votes.
I don’t think I could get Mrs.
Marino to vote for him.
He’s still a candidate for speaker.
I support him.
I can’t be accused of backing an old pal.
Sellner’s not a bad barometer of what the caucus is thinking.
Maybe.
But he’s a bad barometer of what I’m thinking.
Ten minutes with Marino.
– Will.
– Mr.
Vice President.
– Beautiful service, wasn’t it? – Yes, it was.
Just beautiful.
Santos here? – I haven’t seen him yet.
– But he’s coming? So I’m told.
Fifty-eight.
Leo.
Makes you think, doesn’t it? I’m not that many years behind him.
Already called my cardiologist, scheduled a treadmill test, EKG.
Probably time to suck it up and get that colonoscopy too.
Better safe than sorry, right? – You look nice.
– I like to tart it up for a funeral.
Hey, congratulations.
I don’t think I said that.
Don’t worry about it.
I mean, thanks, but, yeah.
Things are getting a little lost, understandably.
You should be proud.
You ran a hell of a campaign.
– Hey, can I ask you a favor? – Sure, shoot.
I sublet my apartment to this nervous woman from Treasury but according to the campaign, I’m done, so they Oh, God, you’re homeless.
– Can I crash at your place? – Tonight? I’ll sleep on the couch.
I’m quiet and clean, like, obsessively.
Of course.
No, sure.
No couch.
I’ve got a guestroom.
I’m sure there’s a bed there somewhere.
– You’re sure? – No, of course.
Anytime.
I I really appreciate it.
Jed? Jed? You ready? People are arriving downstairs.
We don’t have to stay long.
You can just give me a signal and we’ll make a quiet exit.
– Quiet exit? – Well, as quiet an exit as the leader of the free world can make.
– Ronna? – Congressman Marino is here.
– Yeah, bring him in.
– Mr.
President-elect.
– Jim.
– That was a remarkable service this morning.
Really more of a – Celebration.
– Absolutely, I thought so too.
– Let’s talk about your candidacy.
For speaker? Well, you do realize you’re a candidate for the job? But I’m a good 80 votes behind Fields or Sellner.
The deficit hawks talked me into this.
I’m just running to make a point.
What’s your point? Well, I guess it’s the deficit hawks trying to make a point.
About the deficit.
I suppose that would be it, yeah.
What if Fields were to drop out of the race and you suddenly had all of his votes plus about a dozen more? Well, I’d be the speaker, wouldn’t I? – You’re not honestly? – How would you react to a big January push for lobbying reforms? A ban on all lobbyist donations? Has Fields got some sort of health problem? If you were the speaker, Jim? Lobbying reforms.
You got it.
Even with a thin majority? Could be an issue with the DCCC.
I’d do cartwheels on the rostrum.
– I’m not saying Fields is dropping out – You name it, I’ll do it.
– But there clearly is a perception he’s a White House lackey.
God, you’re a handsome devil.
You ready? Yup.
Thank you.
Hello.
– Danny, how are you? – Good, thank you.
Why all the long faces? Leo would be furious to think we were all standing around feeling sorry for ourselves.
We need some music.
Do we have any music? – I have a CD player in my office.
– That’s the spirit.
– Hey, Debbie.
– Sir.
C.
J.
How you holding up? Hey, kid.
Leo loved you.
You knew that, right? I don’t know how he could have done it without you.
You remember that trip to Seattle during the first campaign? When he couldn’t find his umbrella, so you grabbed a garbage can to hold over him? – And it still had garbage in it.
Leo ended up with a three-course meal on his head.
Dry as a bone, though.
That Christmas, Abbey and I bought him a new umbrella and she bought him a new garbage can.
– Hey.
– Can I get you a drink? Yes, but before you spend your time getting me liquored up, I should tell you – You’re a virgin? – No.
– Terminally ill? – No, but what I asked you before – When you propositioned me for sex? – Yeah, it’s not gonna happen.
Donna Moss needs a place.
I told her she could stay.
Well, she can.
She can have the place to herself.
– I can’t do that.
– Why not? – Where will I tell her I’m sleeping? – Who cares? I’ll have to come up with some reason.
My ears get red when I lie.
– I stammer.
She’ll figure it out.
– You’re passing on a night because you don’t know what you’re gonna tell Donna? It’s not about Donna.
I’ll spend the rest of the afternoon strategizing about how to explain it or not explain it.
Or don’t have an explanation, even for myself.
I don’t have an understanding of what it is or where it’s going.
I’ll chew the question over in my brain while people are talking to me about death or affairs of state.
We’ve put this off for seven years.
This will keep another night.
– Hi.
– Hi.
Good to see you.
All hail the conquering heroes.
Congratulations.
– I am so sorry for your loss.
– It’s a loss for the entire country.
– Indeed.
– Where’s your lovely wife? – She had to get to Houston for the kids.
– Lots of changes coming in your lives.
Yeah, I’m starting to gather.
Hello, stranger.
I thought I saw you.
There was a crowd.
I didn’t wanna hover.
– You could have rescued me.
– I decided years back that was not an efficient use of my time.
– How are you holding up? – Great.
Can I steal you for a minute? – Hi.
– Hi.
How’s the Hoover Institute? It’s only been two weeks but, you know, it’s only been two weeks.
You gotta admire conservatives, that you’d name something after Hoover.
Liberals are coy about our mistakes.
You won’t catch us naming something after pretty much anybody.
– Can I talk to you about a job? – How long did you say you’d been at the Hoover? – Two weeks.
Almost one and a half – Nine days.
– I’ve been in meetings that have lasted longer than that.
With charts.
So who’s on the list? For which of the 6000 jobs we’re filling in the next ten weeks? Leo’s.
– I have thoughts.
– Carol Gellsey’s on the list.
– She is? That’s good.
– Yeah.
– Where on the list? – At the top.
– Like number one? – Like number two.
– Baker’s number one? – Yes.
That’s wrong.
That’s a bad choice.
I don’t think your first decision should be so myopic.
– I feel good when we talk.
– You don’t need Baker.
Four years from now, a Congresswoman from Florida will seem like manna from heaven.
– Baker’s got experience Gellsey was in the House six years longer than Matt Santos was.
She was on Ways and Means when he was still in Houston.
– She ran for governor, lost.
– Ten years ago.
Her statewide favorability’s at 63.
Santos wants someone with serious executive experience.
Governor of Pennsylvania is as serious as it gets.
– Come on.
– It’s not nothing.
We’re looking for a senior statesman here.
It’s about gravitas.
You’re looking for Leo McGarry.
He isn’t available.
This is an opportunity.
It’s a moment when the electorate doesn’t have to be convinced a woman can hold high-constitutional office.
They’ll accept it as fait accompli.
Do you think she’s as good as Baker? I think she’s better.
Donald Sherman’s looking for you.
Flee, he’s after Deputy Leg Affairs.
He had me cornered, talking about the leadership.
– Okay.
– He spits little bubbles when he talks.
Is the president still here? He left a while ago but he invited people to the residence.
– What about the president-elect? – I think he’s on the phone in the Roosevelt Room.
– Great.
Do you still have the key to my apartment? I’ve had a key for years.
You change the lock? – No, you should come over.
– That’s sweet.
I can’t.
Why not? I thought the twitchy chick from Treasury was in your place.
– I asked C.
J.
If I could stay with her.
– So unask her.
I can’t.
She’ll ask why.
– So lie.
– She’s my friend.
– Didn’t wanna ask me? – I didn’t know we were at that point.
Okay to have sex in a hotel, but not my apartment? It’s a step.
People get uncomfortable.
I assumed you’d be one.
Uncomfortable with sex in my apartment? Are you really gonna try to convince me I’m the one who finds this all awkward? – No.
– Thanks for asking, though.
It’s sweet.
Nice wake.
Oh, yeah.
Right.
No, I’ll be back over there in a little while.
Okay.
– The president left already.
– Yeah, I saw him go.
Bob Russell selflessly offered to stay on as V.
P.
If we want him.
Really? What did you tell him? I thanked him very much for his many years of dedicated public service then tried to get the hell away.
– Amy Gardner’s pushing Gellsey hard.
– For V.
P.
? She’s a presence in Florida.
Bipartisan support.
– You buy it? – Maybe.
– Amy’s in the lobby if you wanna hear – Yeah, okay.
Barry Goodwin says you spoke to him about Swain for Defense.
– Yeah.
– He thinks it’s a good idea.
You disagree? – Yes, sir, I do.
He also thinks I should round up those 10 extra votes for Tim Fields.
You can’t kick the speakership to one of your best friends in Congress.
Don’t you wanna see lobbying reforms? Not if it means ramming it down the throat of the Democratic Caucus.
Not if everything else we wanna do goes down in flames.
You shut out lobbyists’ access and it’ll never come back.
If you don’t have confidence in my counsel Is this about Barry heading up transition? – Goodwin, the speakership, Swain – I’m sorry you were offended by my hiring Goodwin before clearing it with you.
Backing Fields is a mistake.
The White House is a political operation.
My job as chief of staff is to keep you from making political mistakes.
And this is a whopper.
If you’re looking for a yes man, I’m not it.
I’ll be out in the lobby with Amy Gardner.
The president-elect wants to talk with you about Carol Gellsey.
– Really? – Yes.
You’re a good man.
You have a good soul and nice hair.
– How’s the lumberjack? – He’s a wood sculptor.
And he’s happy all the time, which I used to find irritating and no longer do.
– Really? – He doesn’t race me anywhere.
– That’s great.
– It’s civilized.
– That’s what it sounds like.
– Don’t mock.
You should try it.
– Sure.
– I have a name for you.
– We already did V.
P.
– If you try and staff my whole Cabinet – No, for you.
For sex and civilized conversation.
Sales pitch is a little flimsy.
Sarah Potrero.
She’s a friend and you don’t deserve her but the world’s a cold place.
– We shouldn’t do this.
– It’s time.
You’re approaching the age where people shake their heads.
– Now you’re channeling my mother.
– We should get up to the residence.
The Post heard a rumor Max Manitoba’s up for a Cabinet post.
– Did that come from us? – No.
Okay, I’ll squash it.
– Do you know Sarah Potrero? – From Justice? Yeah.
Don’t you think Josh should give her a call? For a date.
– With you? – Don’t you think it’s enough already? I’m withering on the vine.
Sarah’s a great idea.
She’s a real sweetheart.
Inside the beltway but outside the building.
You’d have a lot to talk about, but wouldn’t step on each other.
She’s ready for long-term, pretend you are.
– Sure.
– It’s what the grownups do.
What exactly do the grownups do? – Mr.
President-elect.
– Amy, so good to see you.
We’ll let you guys catch up.
We will go far, far away.
Josh, I called Congressman Fields, asked him to come back over tonight.
– Would you like me to be there? – I’ll be fine.
Thanks.
Fields would shake things up as speaker.
Yes, he would.
Josh says that you have some thoughts on who should be V.
P.
– I understand Carol Gellsey’s on the list.
– Of course she is.
I’m just not sure that she can be on top of it.
She’s qualified, she’s respected on both sides of the aisle.
– She helps in Florida in the reelect – She’ll look symbolic.
It’s a paradigm-breaking administration.
I can’t walk in and start staffing the place like it’s Noah’s Ark.
The gender gap’s the only reason the party wins.
If only men voted, Democrats would never hold another elected office.
The party’s losing women.
You almost lost this race because of it.
A little patronage won’t make the world stop.
We’re talking about the most unrewarded constituency in the nation.
I’m not getting anywhere, am I? I think Baker’s the right choice.
I think you’re scared.
That’s what’s motivating your choice.
I think you find Baker reassuring.
I just got elected president.
You sure you wanna call me a coward? Josh says that you won’t work at the White House.
I have an agenda.
I pursue it relentlessly.
– I’ve been known to – Here’s what I think.
It’s easier to throw rocks at a house than to build one and you’re ready for more.
You calling me a coward, sir? Director of Legislative Affairs.
Fix the place from the inside.
It’s what the grownups do.
C.
J.
Wanted you to stop by on our way up to the residence.
– Yeah, sure.
– Sarah’s a doll.
– Stop.
– Smart, cute, nice body.
– Okay, this is getting weird.
– Is she in there? – Go on in.
She’s expecting you.
Every day the same damn sandwich.
Turkey sliced so thin you’d think he was gonna wallpaper a room with it.
Lettuce, but not too much lettuce, and mayo, but not too much mayo You were looking for me? Ainsley Hayes approached me about the White House Counsel’s job.
Really? Isn’t she at the Warren G.
Harding Institute or something? – Hoover, but yeah.
She’s terrific.
– She’s still a Republican, right? And she’s still dedicated and incredibly bright.
I think you should get over the Republican thing.
The president-elect’s on a bipartisan bender of late, so I’ll get her a meeting.
I was heading up to the residence.
Coming? I was just thinking about Leo sitting over there in that chair.
Weird, isn’t it? How people are here one minute, and then they’re not.
It’s 10 degrees below zero with a wind-chill factor that’d crack your spine.
No way I’m leaving the van without my jacket, but Leo won’t give it to me.
Says it’ll make me look like I just sledded in from the tundra.
Mind you, I’ve spent my entire life in New Hampshire.
He’s telling me my fellow citizens won’t vote for me if I’m wearing a parka.
Grab a seat, I’m telling the parka story.
These two have fallen asleep.
– Charlie’s heard it.
– More than once.
– New Hampshire primaries? – Yeah.
So Leo won’t give me the parka and we’re pulling it like two guys trying to raise the mast.
Just as we both give it a really strong yank Josh opens the door – Wasn’t me.
– It was you.
– I wasn’t there.
You were there.
Who’s telling the story, me or you? – You, sir.
– Then sit down and shut up.
Josh Lyman opens the door from outside as Leo loses his grip and I go flying out the door ass-backwards on the street in front of 50 TV cameras.
– Maybe five.
– I wasn’t there, I swear What was the headline in the Union Leader the next day? “Favorite Son Falls Flat in Granite State.
” With a huge picture of me lying prone in the street as if I’d been felled by John Hoynes’ welfare plan.
First time I met Leo he was wearing an Italian suit.
– Cost as much as the space program.
– English, not Italian.
Saville Row.
– Has he worn a suit more than twice? – He barely wore them once.
– And those peach shirts.
– Apricot.
He corrected me more than once.
I did like those pink ones, though.
– Not a lot of men get away with that.
– And Leo wasn’t one of them.
He ever pull that Davis Cup thing? – Oh, yeah.
– Me too.
– What thing? – Leo used to tell tall tales.
To test how gullible you were.
Like how he played Davis Cup tennis before he blew out his knee.
He hustled chess in Washington Square Park.
– How he was a train conductor.
– Baseball player.
If you were buying, the stories kept getting bigger.
My favorite was how he almost made the Olympic luge team in 1962.
– He didn’t make the luge team in 1962? – There weren’t any Olympics in ’62.
Don’t worry, I made it to minor-league baseball player.
You didn’t think it weird after he blew out his knee he played minor league baseball? – I made it to dance instructor.
– No, no.
That one was true.
– He taught me to foxtrot.
– Really? Congressman Fields.
Sellner’s out there working the vote twice as hard.
Maybe he thinks you’re gonna shove some members my way.
He doesn’t.
Because I’m not.
You convinced Sellner to back lobbying reform? – He’s worried about keeping the majority.
– Sure, never mind the democracy.
I think he’s right.
Right to protect lobbyists’ ability to funnel cash into? The bill I’m pushing for, but right to protect our House members.
Yeah, from left wing rabble-rousers like you and me.
Tim, the caucus has to pick its own speaker or else he won’t have credibility, and I don’t see how that helps anyone.
You realize if he wins, Sellner will strip me of everything.
I’ll be stuck on some C-level committee on committees midnight hearings on overstock at the Only if you keep fighting him for the speakership.
You want me to drop out? I want you do whatever you think is best for the party.
Is there something for me on the Cabinet, SBA, Interior? We can’t afford to lose your seat, not with just a four-vote majority.
Fill a starving dog’s belly, he’ll never bite you.
The difference between a dog and a man.
If you need any help with federal aid for Houston Yeah.
About 15 years ago, I took him on a fishing trip to help him quit smoking.
– Leo, fishing? – Camping and fishing.
Never wanted to go where he couldn’t see his car.
Well, he smuggled a pack of cigarettes inside his tackle box.
Kept slipping into the woods to have a smoke.
Finally, I got him out on a boat in the middle of this lake and he had a nicotine fit, screaming at me that he has to get back to shore.
I said, “We haven’t caught any fish.
We’re not going back until we fill up this bucket.
” We’d brought a shotgun in case we ran into any bears.
Leo picks up the gun, fires it into the water.
He reloads and fires again.
Pretty soon, fish are rising to the surface all around.
He calmly turns to me and says: “Now give me the damn bucket, please.
” Well, everybody, I think you better call it a night.
– What? No, it’s early yet.
– Jed, 10:30 is not early.
– All right, thank you all for coming up.
– Thank you, sir.
– Good night, sir.
Thanks for inviting me.
– Donna.
Charlie.
Sleep in, Mr.
President.
I’ll cancel breakfast with Tillman.
No, we’ve cancelled it three or four times already.
I’ll be in.
– Okay.
Good night.
– Good night, dear.
Claudia Jean.
I really miss him, sir.
– Good night.
– Good night.
– Tim Fields for speaker? – Yeah.
Santos can’t be messing around with House elections.
That’s what I told him.
– Did he listen? – I don’t know.
You know, I was supposed to be doing this with Leo.
He loved you like a son.
You know that, don’t you? Leo and I are the past.
You’re the future.
It’s up to you now.
We’re counting on you.
You still got my number, don’t you? Call the switchboard anytime.
– They’ll put you right through.
– Mr.
President.
– Mrs.
Bartlet.
– Good night, Joshua.

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