Season 2 – Episode 10 – “Noel”

Episode Summary:

Christmas draws near as an unstable Josh (Bradley Whitford) is ordered by Leo (John Spencer) to consult with a doctor who specializes in analyzing trauma victims. What’s particularly telling is Josh’s identification with a dead fighter pilot who recently took his own life by deliberately crashing his jet — a man who coincidentally shared his birthday and experienced emotional trauma after being shot down over Bosnia. Elsewhere: the President wants to personally sign all of his Christmas cards — which total hundreds of thousands; Sam (Rob Lowe) confronts a representative of the Energy Secretary who publicly advocates release of federal oil reserves; C.J.(Allison Janney) gets personally involved when a foreign White House tourist becomes extremely agitated at the sight of a painting donated by the French government.

Script:

THE WEST WING
'NOEL'
TELEPLAY BY: AARON SORKIN
STORY BY: PETER PARNELL
DIRECTED BY: THOMAS SCHLAMME

TEASER

FADE IN: INT. THE WHITE HOUSE - A SECLUDED ROOM - DAY
CHRISTMAS EVE
Josh pushes the double doors into a slightly bright room. Waiting for him
inside is the
scheduled therapist, DR. STANLEY KEYWORTH. In the corner of the room is
KAYTHA TRASK.
Josh approaches them to say hello as Dr. Keyworth and Kaytha stand up.

JOSH
Hi.

STANLEY KEYWORTH
Hi, Josh.

KAYTHA TRASK
Hi.

STANLEY
I'm Stanley Keyworth. This is Kaytha Trask.

JOSH
Josh Lyman.

KAYTHA
Hi.

JOSH
Do I call you doctor?

STANLEY
I'm sorry?

JOSH
Is it Dr. Keyworth?

STANLEY
Oh, whatever you want. You can call me Stanley if you want.

JOSH
[to Kaytha] And Dr...? I'm sorry?

KAYTHA
Trask. But it's not doctor. I'm not a psychologist.

STANLEY
[as he sits] Kaytha is, uh, training as a traumatologist.

JOSH
I was wondering why there were two of you.

STANLEY
Kaytha's training. You don't mind, do you?

JOSH
No.

Kaytha slowly goes back to the corner to her chair. Stanley eyes Josh's
bandaged hand.

STANLEY
What happened to your hand?

JOSH
[sits] I-I uh, I cut it putting down a glass.

STANLEY
It broke?

JOSH
Yeah.

STANLEY
The glass broke?

JOSH
Yeah.

Stanley writes something in one of his papers.

STANLEY
Well, uh, let me tell you about who we are.

JOSH
Sure.

STANLEY
We're from ATVA.

JOSH
Yeah.

STANLEY
That's the American Trauma Victims Association.

JOSH
Yeah.

STANLEY
We're commonly called in by the government to work with trauma victims. I'll
give you
some examples. The pipe bomb at Lancaster Middle School. We worked with the
parents and
the kids...

JOSH
[interrupts] Tulsa, Hurricane Beth, the Chatham fires, the Iowa tornadoes,
the FBI raid
in Rock Creek.

STANLEY
So, you are familiar with us?

JOSH
Dr. Keyworth, I'm the Deputy White House Chief of Staff. I oversee 1100
White House
employees. I answer directly to Leo McGarry and the President of the United
States.
Do you think you're talking to the paperboy?

STANLEY
No.

JOSH
In your wildest dreams did you imagine that I'd walk in this room without
knowing exactly
who you are and what you do?

STANLEY
No.

JOSH
Then why did you lie to me right off the bat?

STANLEY
Josh...

JOSH
[indicating Kaytha] She's not here training!

STANLEY
As a matter of fact, she is.

JOSH
I read briefing books everyday on subjects considerably more complicated
than ATVA.

STANLEY
She is here training in trauma therapy.

JOSH
Yeah, but that's not why there are two of you.

STANLEY
No.

JOSH
That's not the reason why there are two of you.

STANLEY
No.

JOSH
I get up, go to the bathroom, go to my office, answer the phone -- one of
you watches me.

STANLEY
Yeah.

JOSH
Stanley, you got off to a bad start.

STANLEY
Yes, I did.

JOSH
Yes, you did.

STANLEY
Let's start again.

JOSH
You gonna lie to me this time?

STANLEY
No. You gonna lie to me?

JOSH
Haven't yet.

STANLEY
Really?

JOSH
Yeah.

Stanley nods and waits a moment.

STANLEY
How did you cut your hand?

Josh suddenly does not respond.

STANLEY
You're not talking to the paperboy, either, Josh.

We close in on the speechless Josh and --

SMASH CUT TO: MAIN TITLES.
END TEASER
* * *

ACT ONE

FADE IN: INT. SECLUDED ROOM - DAY
Josh's therapy continues.

STANLEY
I'd asked a woman for some coffee a few minutes ago. Do you want some coffee?

JOSH
No thanks.

STANLEY
Tea?

JOSH
No.

STANLEY
Maybe later.

JOSH
Yeah.

STANLEY
The woman I asked works for you I think... Donna?

JOSH
Yeah.

STANLEY
She works for you?

JOSH
She's my assistant.

STANLEY
Was she at Rosalyn?

JOSH
It's Rosslyn.

STANLEY
I'm sorry?

JOSH
The shooting took place at Rosslyn, Virginia, not Rosalyn.

STANLEY
I'm sorry. I'm not from around here.

JOSH
Where are you from?

STANLEY
San Francisco, California.

JOSH
I always thought it was San Franchisco.

STANLEY
Was she with you?

JOSH
Donna?

STANLEY
Yeah.

JOSH
Nope.

STANLEY
Who was with you?

JOSH
Everybody was with me. We'd just gone to a Town Hall meeting. We'd just
gotten off
television.

STANLEY
Who's everybody?

JOSH
The President travels with a large group of people.

STANLEY
Who's...?

JOSH
It was geared to young people. There were Department of Education people,
event staff,
obviously C.J. Cregg and the press corps, Leo McGarry was there, Bob Shanahan,
Toby
Ziegler, Ziegler's deputy Sam Seaborn, Zoey Bartlet was there obviously,
Charlie Young...

STANLEY
Who was with you?

Josh makes a face.

STANLEY
Josh, I'm trying to get you to tell me what happened.

JOSH
Stanley, I walked out of the building, I heard gunshots, people started
screaming, I woke
up in a hospital room.

STANLEY
Okay. What happened 3 weeks ago?

JOSH
I don't know what you're referring to.

STANLEY
I don't know what I'm referring to either but some of the people you work
with became
concerned with your behavior three weeks ago.

JOSH
Well, I've been concerned with their behavior since long before that.

STANLEY
Josh.

JOSH
They were talking about the pilot.

STANLEY
The pilot?

JOSH
Robert Cano, the Air Force pilot.

STANLEY
And what about him?

JOSH
I don't know.

STANLEY
You just said they were talking about the pilot

JOSH
I said they may have been talking about the pilot.

STANLEY
Well that's not what you said.

JOSH
There was a lot going on. There was the IMF treaty, the petroleum reserves,
Alaska, the
President's...

STANLEY
But you mentioned the pilot.

JOSH
I didn't mention the pilot for any specific reason. I was saying there was
a lot
happening three weeks ago.

STANLEY
Okay then let's talk about three weeks ago.

CUT TO: INT. THE WHITE HOUSE LOBBY - THREE WEEKS AGO
Josh enters the White House lobby where Toby is standing watching a brass
quintet play
'Joy To The World' very loudly.

JOSH
Toby!

TOBY
Yeah?

JOSH
What the hell's going on?

TOBY
What do you mean?

JOSH
Who are these guys?

TOBY
They're a brass quintet.

JOSH
I'm sorry?

TOBY
[yelling] A brass quintet... two trumpets, trombone, baritone horn, French
horn. Do you
like them?

JOSH
Do I like them for what?

TOBY
To play Christmas carols here in the lobby in the morning and evenings as
people are
coming and going.

JOSH
No.

TOBY
Why?

JOSH
Because this isn't the Paramus mall.

TOBY
Let me tell you something, the last two Christmases in this White House I've
been accused
of not being in the proper spirit. I was called names. Not this year! For
the next three
weeks I will be filling this lobby with music in the mornings and evenings
so that we may
all experience this season of... [turning to musicians with annoyance]
Would you people
stop playing for one damn minute!

The brass quintet dies out.

TOBY
This season of peace and joy.

JOSH
Okay.

TOBY
So what do you think?

JOSH
They seem fine.

TOBY
And the loose change they collect goes to pay for musical instruments in DC
public schools.

They start to walk.

JOSH
Toby, Ben Zaharian stepped off the reservation last night.

TOBY
What'd he do? [over shoulder] You guys can keep playing.

The band starts up again and can be heard throughout the halls.

JOSH
He was at a Q&A at the NRDC about drilling the North Slope. He was asked if
the President
would consider tapping into the SPR and he said tapping into the SPR has a
lot of merit.

TOBY
I'll get into it.

JOSH
Thank you.

Josh exits. Toby sees Sam.

TOBY
Sam!

SAM
Yeah.

TOBY
Ben Zaharian did a Q&A last night and he was asked a question about the
strategic
petroleum reserve.

SAM
And he said the SPR's for emergencies like times of war?

TOBY
He said tapping into the SPR has a lot of merit.

SAM
I'll talk to a deputy.

TOBY
Would you please go in and give C.J. a heads up?

CUT TO: INT. THE PRESS ROOM - CONTINUOUS
C.J. is at the briefing. Carol is by the side.

C.J.
...And expressed his confidence when the IMF and the World Bank meet in
Prague next week
some of those restrictions will be relaxed.

REPORTERS
C.J.!

FEMALE REPORTER
To what extent could Pete Didian's objections throw a wrench into the works?

C.J.
Well congress isn't in session but you mean...

Sam enters.

FEMALE REPORTER
Yeah after the first.

C.J.
He sits on the foreign ep sub committee so... Mark.

MARK
This is way out of left field but do you know anything about a woman... I
don't know how
to say this... going a little crazy during a tour.

C.J.
A White House tour?

Sam passes Carol a note who passes it along to C.J.

MARK
Yeah, a woman saw a painting and started screaming.

C.J.
I don't know Mark. There's a painting of Dolly Madison in the grand foyer. You
catch it
in the wrong light it can scare the...

The reporters chuckle.

MARK
Okay.

C.J.
What else? Katie?

KATIE
C.J., last night the energy secretary gave a speech at the Natural Resource
Defense
Council about the perils of drilling on the North Slope. During a Q&A he
was asked about
tapping into the Strategic Petroleum Reserve to help ease oil prices. He
responded that
the idea had a lot of merit. Does this signal a shift in policy since last
June?

C.J. glances at Sam who gives her a small nod.

C.J.
No, it doesn't, but I will say that a bad idea in June isn't necessarily a
bad idea in
December.

KATIE
Why?

C.J.
You don't need to lower the price of heating oil during the summer. Thank
you everyone.

C.J. goes over to Sam. Both walk out to the HALLWAY.

SAM
Thank you.

C.J.
Is somebody going to speak to somebody?

SAM
I'll talk to a deputy.

C.J.
Please.

SAM
What do you suppose that was about with the woman?

C.J.
What woman?

SAM
The woman who went crazy on the tour?

C.J.
We get about five of those a week.

SAM
Really?

C.J.
Yeah.

SAM
What exactly about the White House tour makes them go crazy?

C.J.
The blue blazers? You're going to talk to someone at the energy department.

SAM
Yeah.

They separate. JOSH comes up and begins to walk through the halls with C.J.

JOSH
Good save.

C.J.
Thank you. Where's the President?

JOSH
The situation room.

C.J.
What's going on?

JOSH
Something about a pilot.

CUT TO: INT. THE SITUATION ROOM - DAY
Enter the President and Leo. Everyone stands.

BARTLET
What's going on? Sit down.

MAN 1
Mr. President an F16 Falcon from the 27-fighter wing at Cannon Air Force
Base in New
Mexico has left his group.

BARTLET
What does that mean?

KEN
Returning home from an exercise the flight leader visually realized that
the tail plane
was no longer in formation.

MAN 1
There was no communication from the aircraft and now it refuses to respond
to urgent
radio calls.

BARTLET
Is he in there alone? Is there a crew?

LEO
The Falcon is a single seat fighter.

BARTLET
Did he crash?

MAN 2
If he crashed he would have triggered electronic signals that would have
been picked up
by ground base.

BARTLET
Is there any chance he's trying to contact the ground and can't?

MAN 1
Massive collapse of this plane's communication system isn't very likely.

LEO
Ken, what does he have up there?

KEN
Well he's got a 20mm Vulcan cannon and 7 AIM sidewinder missiles.

BARTLET
Is his intention to defect with a military asset or his intention to blow
something up?

MAN 1
We don't know what his intention is.

BARTLET
Don't our fighter pilors have to go through some kind of psychological
testing?

KEN
Oh they go through extensive screening sir. He was deemed psychologically
fit to fly.

BARTLET
Let me ask a ridiculous question and I know the answer is no. Is there any
way to bring
this plane down without shooting it down?

MAN 1
No sir.

BARTLET
What about populated areas?

KEN
We can take him over the Sierra Madres.

MAN 1
Mr. President, it's possible the pilot lost consciousness due to a dramatic
loss of air
pressure and that's why this is happening.

MAN 2
We've scrambled F16 out of Edwards to get a visual sighting.

MAN 1
If the pilot is dead they'll see signs in the cockpit, if he's conscious
he'll know he's
been painted and he'll be given an order by the interceptors to land at a
designated area.

KEN
If he doesn't that's when we make a decision.

BARTLET
Yeah okay.

STANLEY [VO]
And that's the first time you heard about the pilot?

CUT TO: INT. THE SECLUDED MEETING ROOM - PRESENT
We go back to Josh and his meeting.

JOSH
[very tired] I'm sorry?

STANLEY
That was the first time you heard about the pilot?

JOSH
No I wasn't in the situation room. I don't sit in on those meetings.

STANLEY
But that day was when you first heard out the pilot?

JOSH
Yeah they'd tell me a little later because I had an assignment.

STANLEY
Having to do with the pilot?

JOSH
Yeah.

STANLEY
What was it?

JOSH
I'm sorry if this question sounds rude but how long will we be here today?

STANLEY
Well I'm sorry if this answer sounds rude but as long as I want. I was asked
here by
Leo McGarry.

JOSH
I know who asked you here.

STANLEY
Three weeks ago, the pilot.

JOSH
For the fourth time there was a lot going on that day and I'm not sure why
we have to be
fixated on...

STANLEY
What was the assignment with the pilot?

JOSH
I was supposed to look into his personal records to figure out why he...

There's a loud knocking on the door. Josh jumps. We flash to Josh in a white
dress shirt
and undone tie at home as someone knocks on his door. He looks very startled
and his
hand is bleeding. We cut back to the room.

STANLEY
It's the coffee, Josh.

FADE OUT.
END ACT ONE
* * *

ACT TWO

FADE IN: INT. THE WHITE HOUSE HALLWAY - THREE WEEKS AGO
Leo and Josh are walking down the hallway together. Leo is holding a coffee
cup.

JOSH
When did you find out?

LEO
We were in the situation room about an hour ago.

JOSH
How long has he been up there?

LEO
Ninety minutes since he broke formation.

He grabs a cookie as they continue walking.

LEO [cont.]
They've deployed the 57th Fighter Wing from Nellis, Nevada, the 388th,
the 58th from
Arizona, the 301st out of Texas.

JOSH
How long before I see this on television?

LEO
I'm amazed News Center 4 doesn't have their traffic helicopter up there
right now.

JOSH
And how long before we make visual contact?

LEO
About ten minutes.

JOSH
What do we know about the pilot?

LEO
Not as much as I'd like to.

JOSH
Want me to get into it?

LEO
Get the biographical info. How did this guy get through a fairly intense
psychological
screening process?

JOSH
Yeah.

LEO
We gave this guy an $18 million warplane.

JOSH
I'll get in to it.

Leo walks off, and Josh keeps walking. He bumps into Donna.

JOSH
Sorry. Donna.

DONNA
I have the personnel file for the pilot.

JOSH
How did you know I was going to ask you for that?

DONNA
I'm tuned to you.

JOSH
Seriously.

DONNA
I anticipate your every need.

JOSH
Yeah, but to be walking by with the guy's personnel file?

DONNA
They called me ten minutes ago, Josh, don't be a yutz.

They both stop walking for a beat.

JOSH
Oh.

They resume walking, and go through the LOBBY, where the quintet is playing
'God Rest Ye
Merry, Gentlemen.'

DONNA
On the other hand, you're a very handsome man.

JOSH
What do you need?

DONNA
You're a very powerful and a very handsome man.

JOSH
What do you need?

DONNA
You know how I never ask you for anything?

JOSH
[sounding annoyed] What do you need?

DONNA
Yo-Yo Ma is playing at the Christmas party.

JOSH
Which one?

DONNA
Congressional.

JOSH
Fine.

DONNA
I can come?

JOSH
Give me the file.

DONNA
Can I come?

JOSH
To the Congressional Christmas party?

DONNA
Yeah.

JOSH
Yeah.

DONNA
You can take your Pablo Casals, you can keep your Rostopovich, I say Yo-Yo
Ma rules.

JOSH
Hmm.

DONNA
What?

DONNA stops to make copies.

JOSH
[looking over the file] This guy? The pilot?

DONNA
What about him?

JOSH
He's got the same birthday as me. I'll be in here.

Josh heads for his office. Sam walks up to him.

SAM
Josh.

JOSH
Yeah?

SAM
So I spoke to Jessie Witt at Energy.

JOSH
Yeah.

SAM
I dressed her down pretty good.

JOSH
They're not going to get us to change our policy on the SPR by announcing
that we should
change our policy. [goes behind his desk]

SAM
And I told her that, I told her that in no uncertain terms. [looks down at
the file]

JOSH
And?

SAM
I think we should change our policy.

JOSH
I kind of have to do this thing right now. Can we talk about it later?

SAM
Yeah. [starts to leave]

JOSH
[sits] You know this guy, the pilot?

SAM
Yeah. [turns]

JOSH
We have the same birthday.

SAM
Okay, well, I'm gonna go talk to Leo about the SPR.

JOSH
Yeah.

Sam leaves and Josh begins to look at the file.

CUT TO: INT. HALLWAY - DAY
C.J. and a woman are walking in the hall.

WOMAN
C.J.

C.J
Yeah?

WOMAN
Bernard Thatch from the White House Visitor's office is waiting for you
inside.

C.J.
Yeah, I asked him to come see me.

The woman walks off and C.J. enters THE ROOSEVELT ROOM, where BERNARD THATCH
is waiting
for her. He is a tall guy with a hard English accent.

BERNARD THATCH
Claudia Jean.

C.J.
How you doing, Bernard? [They shake hands.]

BERNARD
I'm not at all well.

C.J.
That's not unusual, is it?

BERNARD
No.

C.J.
I understand there was an incident on a tour.

BERNARD
There's always an incident on a tour. People touch things.

C.J.
Well, you should punish them for that, Bernard.

BERNARD
I've begged my supervisors to allow me.

C.J.
This had to do with a painting.

BERNARD
Oh, yes. It's all in the report. It wasn't a problem.

C.J.
Yeah, but it made it to the Press Room, so I just wanted to check in.

BERNARD
The guide was pointing out the Gustave Callioux hanging outside the Blue
Room.

C.J. nods.

BERNARD
A woman began screaming completely incoherently.

C.J.
In English?

BERNARD
If it was a language at all, its origin was unknown to me. I sent for the
agent on duty,
who attempted to take a statement, but not speaking whatever language was
simply escorted
her out of the building.

C.J.
Well, okay. Thanks for stopping by.

They begin to move towards the door.

BERNARD
C.J., your necklace is a monument to bourgeois taste.

C.J.
Thank you. [fingers necklace]

BERNARD
You're welcome.

Bernard exits the room, and C.J. follows him. They proceed to have a
pedoconference.

C.J.
Listen, who is Gustave Callioux, and how long has this painting been hanging
outside the
Blue Room?

BERNARD
Callioux was a contemporary of Courbet, who was considerably more gifted. This
is a
painting of the cliffs of Etretat, cleverly titled "The Cliffs of Etretat. It
is a minor
work.

C.J.
What's it doing here?

BERNARD
It was on loan from the Musee d'Orsay to the National Gallery. The President,
on a visit
to the gallery, and possessing even less taste in fine art than you have in
accessories,
announced that he liked the painting. The French government offered it as
a gift to the
White House. [Both stop walking.] I suppose in retribution for EuroDisney. So
here it
hangs, like a gym sock on a shower rod.

C.J.
You're a snob.

BERNARD
Yes.

Bernard leaves, and C.J., smiling, walks the other way.

BARTLET [VO]
I'd stay on the phone with Cashmen and Berryhill.

CUT TO: INT. THE ROOSEVELT ROOM - DAY
Charlie enters in on a meeting, and we see Bartlet sitting with several
staffers.

BARTLET
They're going to know when the F-16's have painted him before I will.

WOMAN
Thank you, Mr. President.

Everyone gets up and moves to leave.

BARTLET
Thank you.

Charlie hands Bartlet a folder.

BARTLET
When I was in tenth grade me and my friends took my dad's Ford Country Squire
for a
joyride to Vermont. He locked me in the garage till Easter.

They exit the room, into the HALLWAY.

BARTLET
What do you think we should do with this pilot once we get his ass on the
ground?

CHARLIE
You think that's gonna happen?

BARTLET
[sadly] No.

CHARLIE
Mr. President, they've asked me to talk to you about your Christmas cards.

BARTLET
What about them?

They both walk in THE OVAL OFFICE.

CHARLIE
They want to know which ones you're going to sign by hand and which ones
get the autopen.

BARTLET
I'm gonna sign them all by hand.

CHARLIE
Sir, we went through this last year.

BARTLET
I'm gonna sign them all by hand.

CHARLIE
I'm not sure that's practical.

BARTLET
I don't like the whole idea of the autopen.

CHARLIE
Nonetheless.

BARTLET
Let's do them all by hand. How many can there be?

CHARLIE
Christmas cards.

BARTLET
How many am I sending out?

CHARLIE
1,110,000.

BARTLET
Seriously?

CHARLIE
Yes, sir.

BARTLET
I'm sending out 1.1 million Christmas cards? [sits down]

CHARLIE
It's a three-tier system, sir. There are about a thousand names on the First
Family's
list, then there are about a one hundred thousand campaign workers and
contributors.

BARTLET
Who are the other million?

CHARLIE
You send a Christmas card to everyone who writes a letter to the White House.

BARTLET
I do?

CHARLIE
Yes, sir. And somewhere around a million people wrote you letters this year.

BARTLET
Okay, but some of those were death threats.

CHARLIE
They've weeded those out.

BARTLET
Well, I'm not signing 1.1 million cards.

CHARLIE
I wouldn't think so.

Charlie starts to leave, and Leo enters.

LEO
Mr. President?

BARTLET
1.1 million cards?

CHARLIE
Yes, sir. [exits]

BARTLET
[to Leo] Yeah?

LEO
Situation Room.

BARTLET
What happened?

CUT TO: INT. MEETING ROOM - PRESENT

JOSH
He was dead.

STANLEY
The pilot.

JOSH
Robert Cano, yeah. Leo came and told me.

STANLEY
What had you found out about him?

JOSH
[quietly] What do you mean?

STANLEY
You were supposed to learn about the pilot and brief the President.

JOSH
I didn't learn anything.

STANLEY
Well, you must have learned something.

JOSH
There wasn't time. There was maybe twenty minutes between when I got the
assignment and
when Leo came in.

STANLEY
How'd he die?

JOSH
Cano?

STANLEY
Yeah.

JOSH
He crashed into a mountain, Stanley.

STANLEY
No, I mean, was it 'cause he lost oxygen? Did you have to shoot him down?

JOSH
This was on the front page of the newspapers.

CUT TO: INT. JOSH'S OFFICE - THREE WEEKS AGO
Josh in his office, looking at photos.

STANLEY [VO]
Well, it wasn't in the front page of the sports section, so...

There is a knock on Josh's door. Leo enters.

LEO
It's over.

JOSH
The F-16?

LEO
Yeah, he went into a mountain north of Mexico City.

JOSH
Was the pilot alive when it crashed?

LEO
Yeah.

JOSH
We know that for sure, or we're just...?

LEO
There was a radio communication.

JOSH
From the pilot?

LEO
Yeah.

JOSH
What'd he say?

LEO
He said, "It wasn't the plane."

JOSH
That's it?

LEO
Yeah.

JOSH
Okay. [begins to look through the photos again]

LEO
[sits] So what do you know?

JOSH
The same things you know. He's from Tallahassee. He trained at Laughlin on
T-37's.

LEO'S BODY, STANLEY'S VOICE
What else?

CUT TO: INT. MEETING ROOM - PRESENT

JOSH
Stanley.

STANLEY
What else did you know?

JOSH
I didn't know anything. I knew his, I knew his name, I knew his rank, uh,
I knew where
he trained. I knew his missions.

STANLEY
What else?

JOSH
We had the same birthday.

STANLEY
That's right. And what else?

CUT TO: INT. JOSH'S OFFICE - THREE WEEKS AGO

JOSH
He's got some medals. One of them's a... Purple Heart.

LEO
For what?

JOSH
His plane was shot at over Bosnia. It caught fire, he ejected.

We hear sounds of gunshots and screaming faintly in the background.

JOSH [cont.]
And there were some injuries.

The sounds continue, with sirens, and slowly fade away as the camera turns
back to Stanley.

STANLEY
That's right, Josh. That's right.

FADE OUT.
END ACT TWO
* * *

ACT THREE

FADE IN: INT. THE WHITE HOUSE LOBBY - FIVE DAYS AGO
Bagpipes are heard in the White House Lobby. There is a band of traditionally
dressed
Scottish musicians playing near the Christmas tree. Josh walks by Toby,
who is standing
next to them.

JOSH
Toby.

TOBY
Yeah.

JOSH
Bagpipes?

TOBY
Yeah.

JOSH
You put bagpipes in the lobby?

TOBY
Not just any bagpipes, Josh. Those guys are the Duncan McTavish Clarney
Highland Bagpipe
Regiment.

They start walking.

JOSH
They're a bagpipe regiment.

TOBY
They're three guys from Delaware, but they can play.

JOSH
Two weeks ago, it was a brass quintet; yesterday, it was the Capital Blue
Plate Banjo Band.

TOBY
Capitol Bluegrass Banjo Brigade and those guys were featured on the local
news.

JOSH
They're pretty loud.

TOBY
The bagpipes?

JOSH
Yeah.

TOBY
That's because the shepherds would need to call in the goats from high atop
the hills...

JOSH
Shepherds herd sheep, they don't do it in Delaware and these guys can't play
in the lobby!

TOBY
They money that people toss in their cases will go to buy band uniforms for
the
St. Mary's Assumption Marching Red Raiders.

JOSH
Toby, I'm not kidding.

TOBY
These guys have a fourteen-song repertoire...

JOSH
[screaming] I can hear the damn sirens all over the building! [long pause]
The... bagpipes.

TOBY
[stops] Josh?

JOSH
The... bagpipes.

Josh walks away from Toby, who is standing, watching him.

JOSH
They can't play in the lobby!

C.J. walks out a door in front of Toby.

C.J.
Toby!

TOBY
[still looks as Josh heads for his office.] Yeah.

C.J.
Hang on a second. Carol, a few days ago I met with Bernard Thatch of the
White House
Visitors Office.

CAROL [OS]
Yes, he didn't like my shoes.

C.J.
He said the Secret Service took a report from a woman who had some kind of
an episode
on a tour?

TOBY
C.J.?

C.J.
Uh, hang on. I should really glance at that report, could you get it for me?

CAROL
Yeah. [leaves]

C.J.
Toby, if I get asked the SPR question...

Josh comes out of his office and starts yelling.

JOSH
Would it be possible to hold the noise down out here?!

DONNA
[stops in front of him] Do you need something?

JOSH
I... need the CBO spec.

DONNA [OS]
It's on your desk.

Toby and C.J. are watching, stunned.

JOSH
It's like a damn hockey game out here.

He slams his door shut.

CUT TO: INT. MEETING ROOM - PRESENT
Stanley and Josh are sitting across from each other by a table.

STANLEY
Did you know at this point that there were people who were concerned about
you?

JOSH
I don't... I'm not really comfortable with that question.

STANLEY
I mean concerned with your behavior.

JOSH
I understand what you meant.

STANLEY
If you look back to the days following the pilot, do you remember anything
unusual about
your behavior?

JOSH
No.

STANLEY
Why do you think your friends were saying that?

JOSH
This is incredibly prosecutorial!

STANLEY
I don't care!

JOSH
I think if you want to know what my friends were thinking and why they were
thinking it,
you should talk to my friends.

STANLEY
I did.

JOSH
So I gather.

STANLEY
What was going on on the 19th?

JOSH
The 19th of this month?

STANLEY
Five days ago.

JOSH
Stanley, to say 'what was going on on the 19th...' the number of things that
go on here
during a day...

STANLEY
Name some things that went on five days ago.

CUT TO: INT. C.J.'S OFFICE - FIVE DAYS AGO
C.J. is on a couch with a drink in her hand and an old photograph. Josh
walks in.

JOSH
C.J.! C.J.! C.J.!

C.J.
[preoccupied with the photograph] Yeah.

JOSH
What are you doing?

C.J.
Eating lunch.

JOSH
Why is...

C.J.
Something's strange about this photograph.

JOSH
Listen, why is there no more information coming about Robert Cano?

C.J.
'Cause there's no new information.

JOSH
Okay. [turns to leave the office]

C.J.
There isn't!

JOSH
[turns around and laughs sarcastically] You accept that?

C.J.
Yeah!

JOSH
A perfectly healthy air force pilot kills himself and nobody's asking why?

C.J.
A lot of people are asking why, we just don't know why except that he
obviously wasn't
perfectly healthy anymore!

JOSH
All right. [turns to leave again]

C.J.
Hang on. [gets up and shows him the picture] Look at this picture. Does
something in
this picture look familiar?

JOSH
It's a man holding a little girl.

C.J.
Look behind the man on the wall.

JOSH
The painting.

C.J.
Yeah.

JOSH
Yeah.

C.J.
It looks familiar?

JOSH
It's the same one that's hanging outside the Blue Room.

Josh walks out as Donna passes by him.

C.J.
Are you kidding?

JOSH
I need information.

C.J.
I'm going to the Blue Room.

DONNA
Yo-Yo Ma rules!

Josh stops and stares at her with discontent.

CUT TO: INT. MEETING ROOM - PRESENT
Josh is now pacing the room.

JOSH
She wouldn't shut up about Yo-Yo Ma.

STANLEY
You don't like the cello?

JOSH
I like the cello fine. You asked me what was going on that day and one of
the things that
was going on was that Donna wouldn't shut up about Yo-Yo Ma.

STANLEY
Who was playing at the Christmas Party?

JOSH
Yeah.

STANLEY
Now, the day of that party you had a meeting at the Oval Office.

JOSH
Probably.

STANLEY
No, you did.

JOSH
Okay.

STANLEY
You don't remember having a meeting at the Oval Office that day?

JOSH
It's not unusual for me to meet with the President in the Oval Office five
or ten times
a day.

STANLEY
The meeting I'm talking about wasn't usual.

JOSH
Stanley...

STANLEY
Come on! You're pissed at Sam, you're pissed at Toby, you're pissed at C.J.,
you're
pissed at Donna. Who's next?

CUT TO: INT. THE OVAL OFFICE - DAY OF THE PARTY
A meeting is happening involving the men of the staff. Sam speaks off screen,
and all
we see is President Bartlet.

SAM [OS]
Sir, last year New England had 16.3 million barrels of commercial
inventory. This year,
they have six.

CUT TO: INT. MEETING ROOM - PRESENT

JOSH
Nobody was next. I... I... I don't know what you heard about this meeting,
but...
It wasn't even my meeting!

CUT TO: INT. THE OVAL OFFICE - DAY OF THE PARTY

BARTLET
OPEC will find a way to punish us.

Leo, Sam and Josh are standing in front of him.

SAM
The Saudis have announced that they'd welcome the US tapping into the SPR
to calm the
market. Even the Saudis think that the price is too high.

BARTLET
If the Saudis are that concerned, why don't they just make the old faster?

SAM
Well, they're not that concerned.

BARTLET
I didn't think so.

CUT TO: INT. MEETING ROOM - PRESENT
Josh has his bandaged hand in front view on the table.

JOSH
It was Sam's meeting. He wanted the President to get together with his Energy
and
Economic advisors on the SPR. I was only there for a political perspective.

STANLEY
What does that mean?

JOSH
There are only two things that ever stopped the government from doing anything
money or
politics.

STANLEY
So, you were there to say it was a bad idea politically?

JOSH
Yeah.

STANLEY
Did you think it was?

JOSH
Yeah.

STANLEY
Did you say so?

JOSH
I'm paid to say so!

STANLEY
What'd you say?

JOSH
I told him to... [pause and smirks] You're not gonna understand it.

STANLEY
I'm a fairly well-educated guy.

JOSH
You need to understand the background.

STANLEY
Did you raise your voice?

JOSH
To the President?

STANLEY
Yeah.

JOSH
[laughs] No!

STANLEY
Okay.

JOSH
You don't raise your voice to the President.

STANLEY
Okay.

JOSH
You certainly don't do it in the Oval Office.

STANLEY
Okay.

JOSH
There's always lively discussion and the President's informal with his staff,
but there's
a line you don't cross... Ever. You don't ever cross that line.

CUT TO: INT. THE OVAL OFFICE - DAY OF THE PARTY

BARTLET
Let's set up a meeting.

SAM
Sir, can I say...

BARTLET
You sold me. We're setting up a meeting. [about to walk out of the office]

SAM
Excellent!

JOSH
Can I say I think it's a bad idea?

BARTLET
[stops and turns to Josh] Why?

JOSH
It's not something Didion's gonna like.

BARTLET
Well, I'm just talking about a meeting, but if I decide to do it, the
President controls
the SPR and not Congress.

JOSH
Yeah, but Didion controls the IMF vote.

BARTLET
The two aren't related.

LEO
Let's move on.

JOSH
The two are related!

BARTLET
How?

JOSH
Through Didion.

BARTLET
I'm saying the Strategic Petroleum Reserve and forgiving the IMF debt are
not related.

LEO
Anything else?

JOSH
[ignoring Leo] Of course they're related.

LEO
Josh.

JOSH
If Didion doesn't like that we're tapping into the SPR, he won't let the
IMF debt out
of committee.

BARTLET
We'll talk to him tonight.

JOSH
Mr. President...

BARTLET
At the Christmas party, we'll take him aside...

JOSH
[raises his voice a bit] No, sir, you can't just take him aside...

LEO
Josh, we can move on...

JOSH
[puts his hand in front of Leo's face] We can't move on from it!

SAM
Josh...

JOSH
We can't just take him aside! If we tell him we need his help then we give
him visibility
and power, and we put him in a position to say 'no' and be a hero to his
party! Who
wouldn't want to do that for a living?

BARTLET
Josh, Didion's a good guy, we can talk to him.

Josh walks very close to the President, waves his hands wildly.

JOSH
You need to listen to me. You have to listen to me. I can't help you, unless
you listen
to me! You can't send Christmas cards to everyone, you can't do it! [yelling]
Forget the
SPR, let's get the IMF loans like we said we were going to, listen to what
I have to say
about Didion, and please, listen to me!

Everyone is looking at each other, lost. Josh's breathing heavily, and for
a long moment,
his breathing is the only sound heard.

SAM
Josh.

JOSH
All right, let's move on.

LEO
Josh, go wait in my office, would you?

JOSH
I suppose if it's just a meeting, we...

LEO
Wait in my office.

JOSH
Okay.

He walks out while the conversation carries on awkwardly.

BARTLET
We'll talk with Didion tonight?

LEO
Yeah.

BARTLET
By the way, it's not intervention in a free market if that's what he's
worried about.

SAM
I agree!

BARTLET
It's not free trade if the price of oil is being controlled by a cartel.

LEO
No.

BARTLET
Sam, you'll be in on this?

SAM
Yes, sir.

BARTLET
Thank you.

SAM
Thank you, Mr. President.

Leo and Sam walk out through different doors while the President sits with
his hack to
the camera. Leo walks into his OFFICE where Josh is standing, and closes
the door.

LEO
Have you ever heard of ATVA?

JOSH
Leo...

LEO
I'm here.

JOSH
I think I should go back in there.

LEO
It's the American Trauma Victims Association.

JOSH
Leo...

LEO
We call them in to treat trauma victims, specifically with...

JOSH
I know what ATVA is.

LEO
You're gonna sit with a guy.

JOSH
Leo...

LEO
You're gonna sit with a guy.

JOSH
If this is because of what I just said in there, I wasn't at my best with...

LEO
Josh, I'm not sure you were fully conscious while you were saying it.

CUT TO: INT. MEETING ROOM - PRESENT

STANLEY
Well, thank god for Leo.

JOSH
Yeah.

STANLEY
I'm serious. The man's an alcoholic, he knew what he was talking about.

JOSH
I'm not sure it was as bad as maybe it was...

STANLEY
It was.

JOSH
Stanley, you can ask the questions and you can answer them, but you can't
do both at
the same time.

STANLEY
Yes, I can.

JOSH
Why?

STANLEY
Because I know the answers, and I don't work for you.

JOSH
Is there gonna be a...

STANLEY
How'd you cut your hand?

JOSH
Stanley...

STANLEY
Nah, how'd you do it?

We see a flashback of Josh in his apartment, sitting on a couch with a glass.

JOSH [VO]
I put a glass down.

Josh breaks the glass in his hand. We cut back to Stanley, rolling up his
sleeve.

STANLEY
Yeah, I don't think you did.

JOSH
Stanley, I got home from the thing, I made a drink, I sat down, I pushed
the magazine
aside to use as a coaster, and I missed the coaster.

We cut to the flashback again. Josh is looking at his bloody hands. We go
back to the
meeting room.

STANLEY
You missed the coaster with quite a bit of force.

JOSH
I work out when I can.

STANLEY
I swear I am completely unimpressed with clever answers.

JOSH
And I was so hoping we'd have a second day.

STANLEY
[smiles] You're in nine kinds of pain. You don't know what's going on inside
of you,
and you are so locked into damage control, that you can't...

JOSH
You diagnosed me in eight hours?

STANLEY
Josh, I diagnosed you in five minutes.

Josh looks at him, shocked.

STANLEY
Talk about the night of the party.

CUT TO: INT. JOSH'S APARTMENT - NIGHT OF THE PARTY
There is knocking on the door, Josh doesn't move from the couch.

SUPERINTENDENT
[behind the door, off screen] Mr. Lyman? You in there?

STANLEY [VO]
You said you put down the glass when you came home from a party that night.

JOSH
Yeah. The Congressional Christmas party.

More knocking.

SUPERINTENDENT
Mr. Lyman?

CUT TO: INT. MEETING ROOM - PRESENT

JOSH
The Congressional Christmas party was white-tie, which is unusual, but the
President
likes it...

FADE OUT.
END ACT THREE
* * *

ACT FOUR

FADE IN: INT. THE PRESIDENT'S BEDROOM - NIGHT
Charlie is standing in the center of the room, wearing a frock, looking
uncomfortable.
Bartlet enters.

BARTLET
You look good, Charlie.

CHARLIE
I didn't know people dressed like this anymore, sir.

BARTLET
I've brought it back.

CHARLIE
Yes, sir.

BARTLET
Like Woodrow Wilson and top hats.

CHARLIE
We're not gonna wear top hats with this are we, sir?

BARTLET
No. Thank you.

A man helps him on with coat as he and Charlie leave the room.

MAN
Good evening, Mr. President.

BARTLET
Charlie, this is how Statesmen dress. This is how they dress in times of
occasion.

CHARLIE
Yes sir.

BARTLET
It's regal.

CHARLIE
Yes sir.

AGENT
Eagle's moving.

CUT TO: INT. C.J.'S OFFICE - NIGHT
C.J. enters her office, where Bernard and two people are waiting for her
there.

C.J.
Hello. I'm sorry to keep you waiting.

BERNARD
C.J., this is Rebecca Haussmann and her son, David.

C.J.
I'm C.J. Cregg, David. We spoke on the phone.

DAVID
Yes.

C.J.
Mrs. Haussmann, I'm C.J. Cregg. I'm the White House Press Secretary. [to
David]
Does she understand me?

DAVID
A little.

C.J.
This is your painting. Your father was Augie Haussmann?

MRS. HAUSSMANN
Yes.

DAVID
He was an art collector, mostly of minor impressionists that nobody really
cared that
much about. He was a French Jew.

C.J.
And the Vichy Laws stripped him of his property?

DAVID
[nods] Yeah.

C.J.
Well, best as we can tell, the Nazis sold the painting to a Swiss dealer
sometime after
your grandfather perished at Auschwitz. It made its way to the Musee d'Orsee,
and then to
the National Gallery, where the President spotted it. We've contacted the
French...

BERNARD
[interrupting] Who probably surrendered.

C.J.
...who wanted to settle this matter amicably.

Mrs. Haussmann nods.

C.J.
We'd like you to have our sincere apology, as well as, of course, the painting
back.

MRS. HAUSSMANN
Thank you.

Bernard hands David the wrapped picture.

DAVID
Well, you've made an old woman and her son very happy.

BERNARD
David, do you happen to know what your grandfather paid for it originally?

DAVID
Well, it would have been about the equivalent of $300 U.S.

BERNARD
Yes, that's about right. Would you explain to your mother that I had the
painting
appraised, and it's worth about $400,000 now. You should also tell her that,
if she
likes, we'd be honored to continue hanging the painting, and the longer we
do, the
higher it will appreciate.

MRS. HAUSSMANN
[looks at David] No.

C.J.
Officers McDaniel and Smith from the Park Police are gonna escort you home.

MRS. HAUSSMANN
Thank you very much.

DAVID
Thank you.

C.J. and Bernard watch them leave, then leave themselves. They walk down
the HALLWAY.

C.J.
You see, you try very hard to be mean, but then you see that being nice is
better.

BERNARD
You're a freakish little woman.

They part.

C.J.
So that moment's over?

BERNARD
Yes.

Josh walks by.

C.J.
Oh, Josh! Sam said the Didion meeting went well.

JOSH
Yeah, we'll support a LIEHEAP subsidy for air-conditioning in the Texas 23rd.

C.J.
Josh, it's Christmas.

JOSH
Yeah.

C.J.
We're starting in five minutes.

JOSH
Yeah.

C.J. leaves, Josh stands there.

CUT TO: INT. MEETING ROOM - PRESENT

JOSH
What was the diagnosis?

STANLEY
I'm sorry?

JOSH
You said you diagnosed me in five minutes. What was the diagnosis?

STANLEY
You have Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder.

JOSH
Well, that doesn't really sound like something they let you have if you work
for the
President. Can we have it be something else? Seriously, I-I think you might
be wrong
about that. I-I'm not tryin' to be difficult.

STANLEY
I don't think you are.

JOSH
I know that I-I'm givin' you cocky answers, I that should be...

STANLEY
Listen...

JOSH
I know that you want me to talk about my feelings.

STANLEY
No I don't, Josh. The last thing I want you to do is talk about your
feelings. I think
if you heard a tape recording of this day, you wouldn't hear the word
'feelings.' What
we need to be able to get you to do is to remember the shooting without
reliving it.
And you have been reliving it.

We hear Bartlet's speech introducing Yo-Yo Ma.

BARTLET [VO]
We have polling that indicates that if Johann Sebastian Bach were alive today,
he would
have voted for me.

The crowd laughs.

STANLEY
Right? It happened during the Christmas party?

JOSH
I'm not tryin' to give cocky answers...

STANLEY
I am the guy you tell, Josh! It happened at the Christmas party.

We hear Bartlet again.

BARTLET [VO]
The Bach Suite in G Major. Please help me in welcoming Yo-Yo Ma.

The crowd applauds.

STANLEY
Josh?

JOSH
I was fine.

STANLEY
Josh?

JOSH
It was the Bach G Major.

We hear music playing. We flash to see scenes of the Christmas party.

STANLEY
It's a nice piece.

JOSH
It is.

STANLEY
Did he play it well?

JOSH
It's Yo-Yo Ma.

STANLEY
I've never heard him in person.

JOSH
He's really-he's really quite something,

We see flashes of the White House Senior Staff listening to Yo-Yo Ma.

STANLEY [VO]
How did it start?

We cut back to the therapy.

JOSH
I don't know.

STANLEY
Yes, you do.

JOSH
I was just sitting there.

We cut back to the party.

STANLEY
And then what happened?

JOSH
I don't know!

We suddenly hear a gunshot.

STANLEY
Are you in the fourth grade?

JOSH
I don't know how it started!

KAYTHA
You tasted something bitter in your mouth.

Josh has a flashback to the shooting.

KAYTHA [cont.]
It was the adrenaline. The bitter taste was the adrenaline.

STANLEY
What happened then?

We see Josh at the party. He's hearing scream and shots.

JOSH
I couldn't make it stop.

At the party, Josh winces as if in pain. He has a flashback to the shooting
and feels
as though he is being shot. He remembers the doctors and the ambulance.

JOSH
I couldn't make it stop.

STANLEY
No you couldn't, Josh, but you've been trying for weeks and that's why you
feel sick
inside.

We cut back to the party.

STANLEY
And what happened when you went home that night?

CUT TO: INT. JOSH'S APARTMENT - NIGHT OF THE PARTY
Josh is looking at his bloody hand.

SUPERINTENDENT
Mr. Lyman? Are you in there?

CUT TO: INT. MEETING ROOM - PRESENT

STANLEY
You had an episode at the party, that afternoon you had blown up in the Oval
Office.
What happened when you went home that night?

JOSH
Honestly nothing!

STANLEY
Okay.

He gets up and moves closer to Josh.

JOSH
I sat down on the couch...

STANLEY
Can you honestly tell me...

JOSH
[in his head, he sees the action.] I-I pushed the magazine aside as a
coaster...

STANLEY
...that when the Pilot committed suicide... Can you honestly tell me that
you didn't
wonder if you were suicidal too?

Josh has been hearing the Bach Suite in his head-stops and sees himself with
a bloody hand.

JOSH
I didn't wonder that.

STANLEY
You're lying.

JOSH
I didn't wonder that.

STANLEY
Everything that the two of you had in common...

JOSH
We had nothing in common!

STANLEY
You know you had the same birthday...

JOSH
Who gives a damn if we had the same birthday?

STANLEY
But you knew something else.

JOSH
Stanley...

STANLEY
You knew he has been shot down once, that his plane had caught on fire,
that he had
ejected, and that there were some injuries.

JOSH
[yelling] Stanley! I made myself a drink, I pushed aside a magazine to use
as a coaster.

STANLEY
[yelling] Josh! Josh. How did you cut your hand?

CUT TO: INT. JOSH'S APARTMENT - NIGHT OF THE PARTY
Josh is at his apartment having flashbacks. He can't take it anymore and
puts his hand
through the window.

SUPERINTENDENT
[knocking on door] Mr. Lyman? It's your Super. [knocks] Mr. Lyman, are you
okay in there?

Josh looks at his hand.

SUPERINTENDENT
Mr. Lyman!

The piece ends. We hear applause.

CUT TO: INT. MEETING ROOM - PRESENT

STANLEY
Okay then.

JOSH
Okay then?

STANLEY
[nods] That's that.

JOSH
I'm cured?

STANLEY
[humoring him] Yeah, Josh. You're cured. No problem.

JOSH
Stanley...

STANLEY
I'm gonna recommend a therapist you'll like.

JOSH
I like you!

STANLEY
You're to easy a case for me.

JOSH
I broke a window!

STANLEY
Yeah. Stop doing that. I want to commend you on not hurting anybody else
and not hurting
yourself too badly, but nevertheless, stop doing that. [gets up from the
chair]

JOSH
And... that'll do the trick?

STANLEY
Yup.

Kaytha gets up.

JOSH
I-I'm gettin' short-changed here.

STANLEY
Merry Christmas, Josh! We're done. [puts papers in briefcase] I'll call your
office
after the holidays and give you a number.

KAYTHA
It was nice meeting you.

JOSH
Hang on! What happens if tomorrow some pilot with my birthday decides to
kill himself?

STANLEY
No, that wasn't what started it.

JOSH
What started it?

STANLEY
You were already cooking for a few hours before the pilot.

JOSH
I was?

STANLEY
Usually with a gunshot victim it's a car backfiring, or a twig snapping,
but that's not
what it was with you.

JOSH
What was it?

STANLEY
[turns to Kaytha] Kaytha?

KAYTHA
The music.

STANLEY
The brass quintet.

JOSH
Why would the music have started it?

STANLEY
Well, I know it's gonna sound like I'm telling you that two plus two equals
a bushel of
potatoes, but at this moment, in your head, music is the same thing as...

JOSH
...as sirens.

STANLEY
[nods] Yeah. [puts on his coat]

JOSH
So that's gonna be my reaction every time I hear music?

STANLEY
No.

JOSH
Why not?

STANLEY
Because we get better. [starts to leave]

JOSH
All the same, I need some more therapy!

STANLEY
Oh, you're gonna get some!

JOSH
I mean now! [gets up]

STANLEY
Merry Christmas, Josh!

JOSH
We can order a pizza!

STANLEY
[laughs] Have a good night!

Stanley leaves with Kaytha. Josh follows him out of the room and calls.

JOSH
Stanley, I haven't told you my dreams yet!

STANLEY [OS]
Fax 'em over to me!

JOSH
Merry Christmas.

Josh leaves the room as well.

CUT TO: INT. THE WHITE HOUSE LOBBY - NIGHT
Leo is sitting in a chair reading. Josh enters and doesn't notice Leo.

LEO
How'd it go?

JOSH
[turns] Did you wait around for me?

Leo takes off his glasses.

JOSH
He thinks I may have an eating disorder.

LEO
[gets up] Josh.

JOSH
And a fear of rectangles. That's not weird, is it? [pause] I didn't cut my
hand on a
glass. I broke a window in my apartment.

LEO
This guy's walking down a street, when he falls in a hole. The walls are so
steep. He
can't get out. A doctor passes by, and the guy shouts up "Hey you! Can you
help me out?"
The doctor writes him a prescription, throws it down the hole and moves
on. Then a priest
comes along and the guy shouts up "Father, I'm down in this hole, can you
help me out?"
The priest writes out a prayer, throws it down in the hole and moves on. Then
a friend
walks by. "Hey Joe, it's me, can you help me out?" And the friend jumps in
the hole! Our
guy says "Are you stupid? Now we're both down here!" and the friend says,
"Yeah, but I've
been down here before, and I know the way out."

Josh looks at him.

LEO [cont.]
As long as I got a job, you got a job, you understand? [gestures to Josh's
hand]
You wrapped that yourself, right?

JOSH
[raises eyebrows] The bandage?

LEO
Yeah.

JOSH
Yeah.

LEO
Okay. Donna's gonna take you to the emergency room.

JOSH
She knows?

LEO
She was the one who guessed.

JOSH
I don't need the emergency room.

LEO
Come on, it could be infected, you could have a thing.

JOSH
What thing?

Donna enters with Josh's coat.

LEO
How the hell do I know?

JOSH
Leo...

DONNA
Let's go.

She helps Josh on with his coat.

JOSH
See you later.

LEO
Okay.

Josh and Donna leave. Leo stands for a minute then leaves. Carolers can be
heard singing
"Carol of the Bells."

CUT TO: EXT. THE WHITE HOUSE GATES - NIGHT
Carolers are singing outside. Josh and Donna come through the gates.

JOSH
I don't need a doctor.

DONNA
Are you a doctor?

JOSH
No.

DONNA
Then be quiet.

Josh and Donna stop in front of the carolers. Josh listens with a distant
look on his
face. Donna looks at him.

DONNA
Josh?

JOSH
Yeah.

DONNA
Let's go.

JOSH
Okay.

Donna leads him away. The carolers continue singing, while sirens can be
heard. As the
carolers end their song, we --

DISSOLVE TO: END TITLES.
FADE TO BLACK.
THE END
* * *

The West Wing and all its characters are properties of Aaron Sorkin, John
Wells
Production, Warner Brothers Television, and NBC. No copyright infringement
is intended.

Episode 2.10 -- 'Noel'
Original Airdate: December 20, 2000, 9:00 PM EST

Transcript By: Giorgio, BumbleLion, Joshsgirl, Irene and LocalGomer8

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