Season 1 – Episode 18 – “Six Meetings Before Lunch”

Episode Summary:

When Zoey (Elisabeth Moss) attends a college fraternity party in which one of her friends is busted for using illegal drugs, C.J. (Allison Janney) struggles to keep the embarrassing story out of the press while the White House staff celebrates the confirmation of their nominee, Judge Mendoza (Edward James Olmos, not seen), for the Supreme Court. An uncomfortable Josh (Bradley Whitford) is assigned to talk with the administration’s controversial nominee (Carl Lumbly) for assistant attorney general for civil rights who advocates that African-Americans receive financial reparations for slavery. Elsewhere, Sam (Rob Lowe) crosses swords with Mallory (Allison Smith) over the issue of private school vouchers while Mandy (Moira Kelly) lobbies to secure two new pandas for the National Zoo.

Script:

THE WEST WING
'SIX MEETINGS BEFORE LUNCH'
WRITTEN BY: AARON SORKIN
DIRECTED BY: CLARK JOHNSON

TEASER

FADE IN: INT. THE MURAL ROOM - NIGHT
THURSDAY, 9:45 P.M.
Bonnie is holding a champagne bottle, and a lot of other staffers are gathered
around
a T.V. listening to Mendoza's confirmation vote.

T.V. [VO]
Senator Crossfield.

CROSSFIELD [VO]
Yea.

T.V. [VO]
Senator Crossfield votes yea.

BONNIE
Congratulations everybody. Congratulations. Line up. Only one drink per
person. Who's
driving?

People come to her with glasses. Crystal. Toby walks in.

TOBY
Put it down! Put it down! Put it down!

BONNIE
Toby...

TOBY
No champagne.

BONNIE
We're just getting ready to...

TOBY
Put it down. Everyone in this room let me have your attention, please. The
law of our
land mandates that Presidential appointees be confirmed by a majority of
the Senate.
A majority being half plus one for a total of what, Ginger?

GINGER
51.

TOBY
51 yea votes is what we see on the screen before a drop of wine is
swallowed! Because
there's a little thing called what, Bonnie?

BONNIE
Tempting fate?

TOBY
'Tempting fate' is what it's called. [starts collecting champagne glasses
from everyone]
In the three months this man has been on my radar screen, I have aged 48
years. This is
my day of jubilee and I will not have it screwed up by what, Bonnie?

BONNIE
By tempting fate.

TOBY
By tempting fate! These things take patience. These things take skill. These
things take
luck. In the 15 months we've been in office, what kind of luck have we had,
Ginger?

GINGER
Bad luck.

TOBY
What kind of luck?

GINGER
Very bad luck.

TOBY
We've had very bad luck. [beat] Where's Josh?

CUT TO: INT. JOSH'S OFFICE - NIGHT
Donna is rushing into his office.

DONNA
Josh!

JOSH
Yeah.

DONNA
We got to go. They're already 19 yea votes.

Donna gets to his office. Josh is standing and holding up a note.

JOSH
What's this message about I've got to talk to Mandy about a banana bar? Is
that what
this says?

DONNA
Panda bear.

JOSH
'Panda bear?'

DONNA
Yes.

JOSH
[walks around and shows her the note] That's a 'd'?

DONNA
Yeah.

JOSH
And that's an 'e'?

DONNA
Yeah.

JOSH
All right, you know what would be helpful? If you could just show me where
one word
ends and the next one begins.

DONNA
We have to go.

JOSH
She wants to talk to me about a panda bear?

They walk out into JOSH'S BULLPEN AREA.

DONNA
Yes.

JOSH
You're sure you got the message right?

DONNA
Have I ever gotten a message wrong?

JOSH
No.

DONNA
Then maybe the benefit of the doubt might not be monumentally out of line.

JOSH
A panda's what I think it is, right?

DONNA
Yes.

JOSH
Little Australian thing, eats bark off a koala tree?

DONNA
That's a koala bear I believe you're describing.

JOSH
The panda's the other one...

DONNA
How can you not know the difference between a panda bear and a koala bear?

They go into the NORTHWEST LOBBY. They stop because a photographer is taking
a picture
of someone.

JOSH
You know, for someone who hasn't quite mastered the alphabet...

Mallory enters the White House and walks up to them.

MALLORY
Josh!

Josh and Donna start walking again.

DONNA
My penmanship is distinctive.

JOSH
Your penmanship is illegible. Hey, Mal.

MALLORY
Where's Sam?

JOSH
He's going to be watching the Mendoza vote.

MALLORY
Can you believe him?

JOSH
Sam?

MALLORY
Yeah.

JOSH
Can I believe him?

MALLORY
Yeah.

They cut the corner into a HALLWAY.

JOSH
No.

MALLORY
You think you know a guy...

JOSH
Yeah.

MALLORY
You don't know what I'm talking about, do you?

JOSH
No.

MALLORY
Okay.

JOSH
Okay.

Josh, Donna and Mallory walk into THE MURAL ROOM. Toby is tense watching T.V.
The staffers are sitting around. No longer in the party mood, just in wait.

JOSH
Toby!

TOBY
Joshua.

JOSH
How about some champagne?

CROWD
No...

JOSH
What the hell?

TOBY
Ginger?

GINGER
Tempting fate.

JOSH
Okay. [to Donna] Go grab Leo.

DONNA
It's distinctive penmanship style, Josh.

JOSH
Go.

DONNA
Not unlike Salvador Dali.

JOSH
Please get Leo.

CUT TO: INT. LEO'S OFFICE - NIGHT
Leo is on the phone. Margaret taps on the door.

LEO
[into phone] I can't believe you're talking like this.

MARGARET
Leo?

LEO
[into phone] It's a book jacket, Sydney. It's a dust cover.

MARGARET
[walks to the desk] Leo?

LEO
[into phone] We're really going to make a federal case out of a book jacket? I
mean
we're literally going to make a federal case out of this?

MARGARET
Donna says it's time.

LEO
[still into phone] Sydney, I'm going to bring him up here and talk to him,
but I got to
say... we're about a minute and a half from closing what wasn't the easiest
confirmation
process in American history, so you'll understand if I'm not giddy as a
schoolgirl about
the thought of running once again into the warm embrace of the Senate
Judiciary Committee.

MARGARET
Leo...

LEO
Goodbye.

Leo hangs up. He walks out with Margaret into the HALLWAY.

MARGARET
What was that?

LEO
An appointment to a Justice post favors reparations to African-Americans.

MARGARET
What for?

LEO
Capturing their ancestors and keeping them as slaves.

MARGARET
What kind of reparations?

LEO
Money.

They walk inside THE MURAL ROOM. The crowd is yelling to a 'nay' vote for
Mendoza on
the television.

CROWD
Boo!

JOSH
Loser!

Margaret hurries to sit with a friend. Mallory hugs Leo at the door. The
next vote is
a 'yea.'

CROWD
Yeah! [claps]

SAM
[walks in] Toby!

TOBY
Not yet.

SAM
Our day of jubilee.

TOBY
Not yet.

Mallory was standing behind him, and pops him on the shoulder.

MALLORY
Sam.

SAM
[spins around] It's my day of jubilee.

MALLORY
I despise you and everything you stand for.

SAM
All right, the day was a little bit better a few seconds ago, but that's
all right.

MALLORY
How could you write that position paper?

SAM
Which position paper?

MALLORY
Don't play dumb with me.

SAM
No, honestly I am dumb. Most of the time I'm playing smart.

MALLORY
Sam, the position paper...

SAM
Mallory, you can't be thinking about ruining my day of jubilee by yelling
at me about
school vouchers.

MALLORY
I was strongly considering it, yes.

SAM
Mallory...

JOSH
50! Here we go, baby!

LEO
Sam. Toby. You're about to put a guy on the Supreme Court.

The crowd is silent.

T.V. [VO]
Senator Rindell.

RINDELL [VO]
Yea.

Massive cheering. Even Toby, who was holding a bottle of champagne in his lap,
smiles
and puts up his hands in victory.

SAM
Toby? How about now?

Toby opens the bottle, the champagne foams up and all over his lap as he
stands.

SMASH CUT TO: MAIN TITLES.
END TEASER
* * *

ACT ONE

FADE IN: INT. THE MURAL ROOM - NIGHT
THURSDAY, 11:30 P.M.
After the celebration, Josh is sprawled on a chair by the fireplace. Donna
is on the
couch.

JOSH
I don't understand. Salvador Dali had distinctive penmanship?

DONNA
Yes.

JOSH
How was it distinctive?

DONNA
Well, for one thing, he wrote in Spanish.

JOSH
He was Spanish.

DONNA
Which would account for his distinctive penmanship.

LEO
[walks up] Excuse me. Am I interrupting something important?

JOSH
I can't even begin to tell you how you're not.

LEO
[giggles] [to Donna] Would you mind if I have a...

DONNA
[gets up and picks up her shoes] I'll go see if people are having fun in
the other room.
[leaves]

JOSH
What's up?

LEO
Our nominee for Assistant Attorney General for Civil Rights.

JOSH
It's going to sail?

LEO
No, it's not.

JOSH
Jeff Breckenridge?

LEO
Stadler has a problem with him.

JOSH
What's his problem?

LEO
He supports slavery reparations.

JOSH
Since when?

LEO
Whenever.

JOSH
I mean... was there a thing? [stands]

LEO
Two sentences on the back dust jacket of a book that's coming out called
The Unpaid Debt.

JOSH
That's it?

LEO
Stadler's unhappy.

JOSH
Cause of a thing he wrote on a dust cover?

LEO
I've been singing that song for the last three hours. So talk to him tomorrow,
would you?

JOSH
Stadler?

LEO
Breckenridge.

JOSH
I'm not the guy for this.

LEO
Yeah, you are.

We hear the crowd from the other room.

LEO
What the hell is that?

JOSH
C.J.'s going to do 'The Jackal.'

LEO
Oh, where she lip synchs to the thing?

JOSH
Yeah.

LEO
[smiles] I love that.

JOSH
Toby's better for this. Look at the job he did on the Mendoza confirmation.

LEO
Toby's barely alive as a result of the Mendoza confirmation. This one's
you. Let's go
watch 'The Jackal.'

Leo walks, Josh follows into the HALLWAY.

JOSH
Leo...

LEO
Yes.

JOSH
I'm a white guy from Connecticut.

LEO
We've met, Josh.

JOSH
I'm saying, isn't this kind of a delicate subject for me to get into with
a black civil
rights lawyer from Athens, Georgia?

LEO
Remember, you're also Jewish.

JOSH
Then he's sure to love me.

LEO
Yeah.

They meet up with Cathy, walking down the hall.

LEO
Cathy! Where's Sam?

CATHY
In his office, fighting with your daughter.

LEO
Tell him to come to the Press Room. He's not going to want to miss 'The
Jackal.'

CUT TO: INT. SAM'S OFFICE - NIGHT
Mallory and Sam are in his office and having a discussion.

SAM
It was a position paper.

MALLORY
And your position is that school vouchers are a good idea?

SAM
How did you get this paper?

MALLORY
I'm related to your boss.

SAM
Your father gave you my position paper?

MALLORY
Yes.

SAM
See. I think he's trying to drive a wedge between us.

MALLORY
It worked.

SAM
Look...

Knock on the door.

CATHY
Sam.

SAM
Yes?

CATHY
C.J.'s doing 'The Jackal.'

SAM
I'll be right there.

MALLORY
I thought we had something going on, Sam.

SAM
We do.

MALLORY
And yet you haven't told me that you favor school vouchers?

SAM
I... first of all, hang on. We haven't been on a date yet.

MALLORY
I'm saying...

SAM
And what kind of dates have you had that you're amazed this hasn't come up?

MALLORY
I'm a public school teacher.

SAM
Seriously. The other guys. They order drinks and they say, "Before we go
any further,
I'd like you to know my position on school vouchers?"

MALLORY
Are you going to have a serious discussion with me about this?

SAM
No.

MALLORY
No?

SAM
No. Because you know why? Because I am off duty. Toby and I have spent the
last three
months putting a guy on the bench. The sun has set and I have earned my
government
salary and then some. I'm done working. And we haven't been out on a date
and that's
supposed to be tonight. Now we're going to go in there and watch C.J. do
'The Jackal.'
And believe me, if you haven't seen C.J. do 'The Jackal,' then you haven't
seen
Shakespeare the way it was meant to be done. We're going to watch C.J. do
'The Jackal'
and then we're going to get a late dinner, after which I may or may not kiss
you good
night. 'Cause there is something going on between us, Mallory. But frankly,
I don't
think you're doing a very good job on your part, so I've decided to take over.

MALLORY
You're taking over?

SAM
Yes. Let's go.

MALLORY
Not much chance.

SAM
I didn't think so, but you got to give me credit for trying.

MALLORY
Good night there, Skipper. [leaves]

SAM
Apparently you don't have to give me credit for trying.

CUT TO: INT. PRESS ROOM - NIGHT
The crowd is thick to watch. Toby pushes a button on the radio. The jazz
plays. Toby
is smiling. C.J. is in the middle of the room, and the crowd encourages her
to begin.
C.J. pantomimes and lip synchs to 'The Jackal.'

C.J.
'He was fat black cat cool like a Friday afternoon martini, chillin' at a
quarter
after five. Twist of lime. Coke on the side. The brother loved the high
life. Had a
PhD in Street Strife. They called him the Jackal... The Jackal.'

The crowd loves it. The singer laughs, with a great deep voice. Josh claps
and makes
his way toward Toby, who's smoking a cigar.

JOSH
There's a little speed bump with Jeff Breckenridge. Leo gave it to me because
he thinks
you're burned out after Mendoza. I said I thought that was ridiculous. What
do you think?

TOBY
[long pause] Are you talking to me... during 'The Jackal?'

JOSH
I was just...

Toby actually bops up and down! He is one giddy man, smiling, a giggle in
his voice.

TOBY
Never talk to me during 'The Jackal.'

JOSH
Sure.

Toby blows smoke rings.

C.J.
'He was big Mack daddy super black stylin' a diamonds in the back Cadillac. Fur
lined
boards. White walled wheels. Cruise control. Built for speed. Chrome on
everything.
And the stereophonic speakers. But he really didn't need them. When they
called him...
The Jackal.'

The crowd claps. Leo is watching with a smile on his face as Sam walks to him.

SAM
Hey.

LEO
Hey.

SAM
So Mallory read my position paper on school vouchers.

LEO
Really?

SAM
Yeah.

LEO
How do you suppose she got a hold of that?

SAM
Well, as it turns out, you gave it to her.

LEO
Hmmm. School vouchers is a serious subject with Mallory.

SAM
Yeah, thanks for the heads up.

LEO
I don't mind you dating my only daughter, but you can't expect me not to
have some fun
along the way.

SAM
Mallory and I haven't actually been on a date yet.

LEO
Well, you hang in there, son.

C.J.
'Fly boy was in the buttermilk hard. Livin' fast. Livin' large. Six foot
four and not
an ounce of fat. When women ask, "Is you a proud cat?" He'd say, "Oh,
dear. I'm more
than that. I'm the roanest of the roan. And in case you hadn't known... They
call me
The Jackal. The Jackal... The Jackal.'

The crowd applauds as the jazz fades.

CUT TO: INT. C.J.'S OFFICE - NIGHT
C.J. is at her desk, humming, back to the door as Danny walks in. He sees
her move her
hips to a song.

DANNY
You did 'The Jackal?'

C.J.
What are you doing here so late?

DANNY
I missed 'The Jackal?'

C.J.
I was on fire tonight.

DANNY
Congratulations on Mendoza, that's got to feel good.

C.J.
It does. [takes a gulp of champagne]

DANNY
So I'm home. By myself. Listening to my police scanner.

C.J.
You have a police scanner?

DANNY
Yes, I do.

C.J.
Danny, you were like, President of your high school audio-visual club,
weren't you?

DANNY
I was, in fact, not President of the AV Club. I was vice-President. Bobby
Pfeiffer was
President, and that's something I don't like to talk about.

C.J.
Why'd you come down?

DANNY
Josh said to come by for a drink.

C.J. puts on her scarf. She's going home.

C.J.
You should have gotten here earlier.

DANNY
I would have, except I was home listening to my police scanner.

C.J.
What happened?

DANNY
David Arbor was arrested outside a frat party. He's going to be charged with
felony
possession and possible intent to distribute.

C.J.
Is there any chance David Arbor is not the son of Bob Arbor?

DANNY
There's not any chance of that. No. Plus one other thing...

C.J.
One, there's one other thing?

DANNY
Yeah.

C.J.
What?

DANNY
Zoey was at the frat party.

C.J.
Well, at least I know what I'll be doing when I come into work
tomorrow. [starts to take
off her coat]

DANNY
Speaking of tomorrow, when you start handing out information, please remember
I came down
here at one in the morning to tell you this when there was no earthly reason
that I had
to, and also that you're secretly in love with me.

C.J.
Make sure you remind my office.

DANNY
You could do 'The Jackal' for me. Right here, right now.

She flips his scarf over his shoulder and rubs his arm.

C.J.
Go home.

DANNY
Okay.

Danny exits. C.J. picks up the phone.

FADE OUT.
END ACT ONE
* * *

ACT TWO

FADE IN: INT. HALLWAY - DAY
C.J. and Carol are walking and talking.

C.J.
Do this... I'm honestly not sure the President even knows.

CAROL
I'm honestly not sure the President even knows.

C.J.
Yeah, you know why? Because it's such a non-story it hasn't come up yet
today. Say it now.

CAROL
I'm honestly not sure the President even knows.

C.J.
The kid's father's a major Democratic fundraiser.

CAROL
And I'm sure the President would offer him his best wishes and support during
what must
be a troubling time.

C.J.
The President's daughter was at a party where there was a drug bust.

They go inside C.J.'S OFFICE.

CAROL
Zoey left the party well before the incident.

C.J.
Has the President had any reaction at all?

CAROL
I'm honestly not sure the President even knows.

C.J.
There it is.

Carol leaves. Mandy comes from the other door.

MANDY
Hey, C.J.

C.J.
It's a non-story.

MANDY
Let's keep it that way.

Mandy taps on Josh's open office door. She walks inside JOSH'S OFFICE. Josh
is sitting
with his feet on his desk.

JOSH
Hey.

MANDY
Did you get my message?

JOSH
Yeah, you didn't want to talk to me about banana bars by any chance, did you?

MANDY
Panda bears.

JOSH
Donna has stylish penmanship.

MANDY
I think we should get a panda bear.

JOSH
You say that now, but I'm the one who's going to end up feeding him and
walking him.

MANDY
You guys have gotten something more than 3000 letters in the last ten days,
wanting to
know when we're getting a new bear for the National Zoo?

JOSH
What happened to the old bear?

MANDY
Lum-Lum?

JOSH
Okay.

MANDY
She died two weeks ago.

JOSH
Did I kill her?

MANDY
No.

JOSH
Then what are you talking to me for?

MANDY
3,000 letters in 10 days.

JOSH
Did I write any of them?

MANDY
No.

JOSH
Then once again...

MANDY
Who should I be talking to?

JOSH
About getting a new panda bear?

MANDY
Yes.

JOSH
To replace Lum-Lum?

MANDY
Yes.

JOSH
Toby. You should be talking to Toby.

Donna walks in with files. Lots of files, and sets them on the chair in
front of Josh's
desk. She hands him the top one.

DONNA
This is most of it.

JOSH
Thanks.

Donna leaves.

MANDY
Toby?

JOSH
Yeah. Toby can help you out.

MANDY
What's all this?

JOSH
I have to tell a black civil rights lawyer why I don't owe him any money.

MANDY
Good luck.

JOSH
Thanks.

CUT TO: INT. COLLEGE CAFETERIA - DAY
Zoey and her friends are practicing French at a table.

GIRLS
Nous habite.

ZOEY
Ils habitons.

GIRLS
Ils habitons.

ZOEY
Je travaille.

GIRLS
Je travaille.

ZOEY
Tu travaille.

GIRLS
Tu travaille.

ZOEY
Nous travaillons.

GIRLS
Nous travaillons.

Two agents, Mike and Gina, are around.

MIKE
...at the Southwest entrance.

GINA
How many?

MIKE
About a dozen.

GINA
Have someone bring the car around back.

Mike goes. Gina goes to Zoey's table where she's there with friends, one of
which is STACY.

ZOEY
What time is it?

GIRL
12:30.

ZOEY
I have to go.

GIRL
Are we doing French in Kelly's room tonight?

ZOEY
Yeah, about 10.

GIRL
Okay.

Zoey and Stacy start to leave.

GINA
Zoey. This way, we're going out back.

ZOEY
What's out front?

GINA
There's a reporter out there.

STACY
They're not supposed to come on campus.

GINA
Campus security's on its way.

ZOEY
[to Stacy] Can I ask you a question? What is up with Marjorie's hair?

STACY
Yes, I know! I didn't want to say anything back at the table. [They both
giggle.]

ZOEY
[to Gina] Gina, listen to this... we've been falling asleep listening to
our French tapes.

GINA
I remember them well.

ZOEY
Are you ready?

ZOEY and STACY
Michelle, Anne, Vous travaillez? Ah. Non. Nous regardons le
television. Porquois?

They walk into the KITCHEN. Gina is ahead and a reporter, EDGAR DRUMM,
runs in view.

EDGAR DRUMM
Zoey!

Gina knocks him back to the freezer.

DRUMM
Hey!

GINA
I'm Special Agent Gina Toscano of the U.S. Secret Service, what's your name?

DRUMM
Edgar Drumm of the Charleston Citizen. I have a question for Miss Bartlet.

GINA
She doesn't answer questions here.

DRUMM
Yeah. Zoey.

Gina turns around and Mike is there.

GINA
Mike, take her to the car.

DRUMM
Zoey, what do you think it says about the country that the President's
daughter is
partying with drug dealers?

ZOEY
What the hell?

STACY
Can you believe it?

DRUMM
What do you think it says about the country?

STACY
David Arbor isn't a drug dealer.

GINA
Stacy...

DRUMM
Yeah, why'd you go to the party, Zoey?

ZOEY
[was heading off, but spins around] I was invited. I didn't even know David
Arbor was
going to be there.

GINA
Guys! I want you in the car now.

The girls and Mike walk to the car.

STACY
You're a real jackass, you know that?

Drumm laughs. He got a quote. He takes out his notebook.

GINA
Don't ever do that again.

DRUMM
I have to say if this is how the Secret Service behaves in the Bartlet
Administration,
it's a sad state of affairs.

GINA
We're all going to have to learn to live with your disappointment. [smiles
pleasantly
and then heads off]

CUT TO: INT. COMMUNICATIONS OFFICE - DAY
Sam comes out of his office with papers. Cathy is at her desk.

SAM
This draft is done.

The office staff turns and applauds.

SAM
This draft is done, and it's done on schedule. On schedule is going to be
my middle
name from now on. Seriously. I'm having it legally changed.

CATHY
What was it before?

SAM
Norman.

CATHY
Okay.

SAM
Speaking of schedules, Cathy.

CATHY
[looks on Sam's appointment book] At noon you're on the Hill with Brennan
and Landis,
3:00 with the East Asia team, 4:00 with Medicare, 4:30 with the President,
6:00 with
the advance team.

SAM
The noon meeting with Brennan and Landis on the Hill?

CATHY
Yeah?

SAM
Let's see if we can cancel it.

CATHY
Why?

SAM
I don't want to go.

CATHY
That's not a good enough reason.

SAM
I really don't want to go.

CATHY
You're going.

SAM
Okay. [heads back to his office]

CATHY
And you've got Mallory at eleven.

SAM
[turns] What?

CATHY
You've got Mallory at eleven. Right now.

SAM
What do you mean I've got Mallory?

CATHY
Your appointment with Mallory.

SAM
What appointment with Mallory?

MALLORY
[appears] I decided to see you during your business hours.

SAM
Mallory.

MALLORY
Hello.

SAM
Why aren't you in school?

MALLORY
No school today.

SAM
You made an appointment?

MALLORY
I didn't want to take advantage of the fact that we're dating.

SAM
We're not dating.

MALLORY
That's kinda sad for you, isn't it?

SAM
You made an appointment?

MALLORY
All nice and business like.

SAM
Well, isn't that adorable? Come in.

Mallory goes into his office. Ssam looks in disbelief at Cathy, then goes
in and shuts
the door.

CUT TO: INT. JOSH'S OFFICE - DAY
Donna goes to announce his appointment.

DONNA
Josh?

JOSH
Is he here?

DONNA
Yeah.

JOSH
Send him in.

DONNA
Mr. Breckenridge?

Josh straightens his desk, then JEFF BRECKENRIDGE comes in.

JEFF BRECKENRIDGE
Thank you.

JOSH
Jeff, I'm Josh Lyman.

JEFF
Jeff Breckenridge.

They shake hands. Josh motions for him to sit.

JOSH
Good to meet you. Help yourself to a chair. Can Donna get you anything?

JEFF
No, thank you. I'm fine. [sits]

JOSH
You were a second year summer intern at Debevoise and Plimpton when my father
was a
partner there. [sits]

JEFF
Your father was a partner at Debevoise and Plimpton?

JOSH
Yeah.

JEFF
Your father's Noah Lyman?

JOSH
Yeah.

JEFF
I met him. He's a wonderful man. How is he?

JOSH
He died.

JEFF
I'm sorry. When?

JOSH
The night of the Illinois primary.

JEFF
I'm sorry.

JOSH
Thanks. Listen. I just got this handed to me last night, so I'm not as up
to speed as
I'd like.

JEFF
A couple of Republicans on the Judiciary Committee have a problem with me.

JOSH
Stadler.

JEFF
Also probably Wachtel and Tellison.

JOSH
Probably.

JEFF
Any specific problem or they just don't like me on spec?

JOSH
No.
[laughs a little] There's a book coming out by Otis Hastings called The
Unpaid Debt.
Hastings' position is that African Americans are owed monetary reparations
for slavery.

JEFF
Yes.

JOSH
You're quoted on the back jacket.

JEFF
Yes.

JOSH looks at the book on his desk.

JOSH
You wrote, "Otis Hastings is a unique and extraordinary historian. This book
should be
read by everyone and burned into the minds of white America."

JEFF
Yes.

JOSH
Just to start, you weren't misquoted... right?

JEFF
No.

JOSH
Okay. And I'm assuming that if asked by the Committee, you'll say that you
favor
reparations?

JEFF
If asked, I'll tell the Committee that my father's fathers were kidnapped
outside a
village called Wimbabwa, brought to New Guinea, sold to a slave trader from
Boston
and bought by a plantation owner in Wadsworth, South Carolina, where they
worked...
for no wages.

JOSH
And you're looking for back pay?

JEFF
Yes.

JOSH
Just out of curiosity... did you have a figure in mind?

JEFF
Dr. Harold Washington, who's chief economist at the Manchester Institute,
calculated
the number of slaves held, multiplied it by the number of hours worked,
multiplied that
by the market value of manual labor and came up with a very conservative
figure.

JOSH
What is it?

JEFF
1.7 trillion dollars.

Josh was taking a sip of coffee that he's now having a hard time swallowing.

JOSH
Okay. Listen, this is probably a better discussion to have in the abstract,
don't you
think?

JEFF
No.

JOSH
What do you mean?

JEFF
I mean someone owes me and my friends 1.7 trillion dollars.

FADE OUT.
END ACT TWO
* * *

ACT THREE

FADE IN: INT. C.J.'S OFFICE - DAY
C.J.'s working on the laptop on her desk and there's a knock on the door.

C.J.
Yeah.

CAROL
[enters] Charlie's here.

She opens the door further and we see Charlie in the hall. He walks in.

C.J.
Yes indeed. Charlie, Charlie, Charlie, Chaz.

CHARLIE
I hear you burned the place down last night.

C.J.
'The Jackal?'

CHARLIE
Yeah.

C.J.
I can bring it. What's up?

CHARLIE
Zoey called.

C.J.
What'd she do?

CHARLIE
She had a little run-in on campus with a reporter named Edgar Drumm who
writes for a
newspaper called the Charleston Citizen.

C.J.
Edgar Drumm isn't a reporter. He's a professional Bartlet baiter, and the
Charleston
Citizen isn't a newspaper, it's fund-raising newsletter for the radical
right. What'd
he ask her?

CHARLIE
He asked her if the President's daughter should be partying with drug dealers.

C.J.
Did she talk to him?

CHARLIE
Gina put her in the car. The thing she wanted me to ask you about was
this... David
Arbor's a good friend and she really loves him a lot and he's not a drug
dealer and
she wanted to see what you could do about nipping that in the bud.

C.J.
I can talk to a couple of people.

CHARLIE
The guy doesn't sell drugs. He just buys them, takes them and gets
unconscious. Zoey
and her friends are trying to help him. In fact, Zoey was bringing him back
the car
keys she confiscated from him last week.

C.J.
[calls] Carol!?

CHARLIE
The guy drives a Porsche.

CAROL
[comes to the door] Yeah.

C.J.
Tell Danny I'm coming to see him.

CAROL
Sure.

C.J.
I drove my boyfriend's Porsche once.

CHARLIE
How'd it go?

C.J.
Backed it into a pond.

CHARLIE
Lost your driving privileges?

C.J.
And the boyfriend.

CHARLIE
It's a good car, though.

C.J.
Yeah.

Charlie leaves, and C.J. goes back to typing.

CUT TO: INT. NORTHWEST LOBBY - DAY
Toby walks down the hall, meets up with Margaret.

MARGARET
Hey, Toby.

TOBY
Hey there, Margaret.

MARGARET
Are you okay?

TOBY
Yeah. Why wouldn't I be okay?

MARGARET
You don't usually say, "Hey there, Margaret."

TOBY
[giggles] What do I usually say?

MARGARET
You usually growl something inaudible.

TOBY
Not today.

MARGARET
I see.

TOBY
You, on the other hand, should turn that frown upside down.

MARGARET
I'm sorry?

TOBY
Let your smile be your umbrella, Margaret.

MARGARET
Okay, now you're scaring the crap out of me, Toby.

Margaret walks off. Toby walks and sings.

TOBY
[singing] Gray skies are going to clear up... Hi Bobby. Put on a happy
face. Hi Janet.

A lot of people in the hallway are confused by him.

CUT TO: INT. SAM'S OFFICE  - DAY
Mallory and Sam are in the middle of a deep discussion.

MALLORY
Tax dollars should go to public schools, not aiding the shipment of students
to private
schools, many of which are religious. And by the way, I don't know how you're
getting
around the separation of Church and State on that one.

SAM
We have people on the payroll who are experts at obfuscating the Constitution.

MALLORY
So I've noticed.

SAM
Anything else?

MALLORY
Oh, yes. [pulls out her list from his position paper]

SAM
We've been here for an hour, Mallory.

MALLORY
School vouchers provide help for only a few students.

SAM
We're offering a solution for that.

MALLORY
You're offering a lifeboat to the select few for whom vouchers will make
any kind of
difference.

SAM
Mallory, everything that you're saying makes sense. I just think that the
state of
urban schools is such that if you can save even one kid...

MALLORY
[stands] You can save more than one kid.

SAM
Tell me how.

MALLORY
By asking Congress to approve, not just a little, but a lot more money for
public
education.

Sam laughs.

MALLORY
What?

SAM
[stands] Public education has been a public policy disaster for 40
years. Having spent
around four trillion dollars on public schools since 1965, the result has
been a steady
and inexorable decline in every measurable standard of student performance,
to say
nothing of health and safety. But don't worry about it, because the U.S. House
of
Representatives is on the case. I feel better already.

MALLORY
[beat] Wow.

SAM
What?

MALLORY
For a guy who's trying to date me, that was pretty snotty.

SAM
Well, hang on. These are office hours. If I'd know I was working on that I
would have
had a whole different attitude.

CATHY
[comes in] Sam...

SAM
Thank God.

CATHY
The meeting on the Hill?

SAM
The meeting on the Hill. I'd love to keep talking, Mal, but I have this
meeting on the
Hill.

CATHY
I canceled it.

SAM
Why?

CATHY
You asked me to.

SAM
Yes, I did.

Cathy leaves.

CUT TO: INT. PRESS ROOM - DAY
Danny is typing at his desk. C.J. walks to him.

C.J.
Danny?

DANNY
Yes.

C.J.
You hear anything about Edgar Drumm talking to Zoey?

DANNY
You know what you never do?

C.J.
What?

DANNY
You never tell me you like my suspenders.

C.J.
Danny.

DANNY
I'm just saying...

C.J.
Edgar Drumm.

DANNY
He asked her if the President's daughter should be partying with drug dealers.

C.J.
That's what I heard. [gets up to walk away]

DANNY
She said she didn't know Arbor was going to be there.

C.J.
[turns around] What?

DANNY
It's Edgar Drumm, C.J. No one...

C.J.
Danny?

DANNY
It's Edgar Drumm. No one...

C.J.
Yeah.

DANNY
What?

C.J.
Nothing.

DANNY
What?

C.J.
Nothing. Those really are nice suspenders.

C.J. leaves.

CUT TO: INT. JOSH'S OFFICE - DAY
Josh and Jeff are still in their meeting.

JEFF
Special Field Order Number 15.

JOSH
What? [sits back at his desk with another cup of coffee]

JEFF
I'm saying slavery reparations aren't anything new. January 16th, 1865,
General Sherman
issued Special Field Order Number 15. Nearly a half million acres from South
Carolina
to Florida were divided up into 40 acre plots and given to newly freed
slaves. He also
granted them the use of various decommissioned army supplies including...

JOSH
Mules.

JEFF
Yes.

JOSH
40 acres and a mule.

JEFF
Yes. But the order was rescinded four years later by Andrew Johnson. In the
'60s, during
the Newark riots, you could hear the looters shouting, "That was my 40 acres,
I'll be
back for the mule." [drinks coffee]

JOSH
Catchy.

JEFF
See, if you guys had just paid up on time...

JOSH
A lesson well learned. But let's talk about your confirmation.

JEFF
Absolutely.

JOSH
And while we're on the subject of the Civil War, let's remember the 600,000
white men
who died over the issue of slavery.

JEFF
Is that why they died?

JOSH
It's why a lot of them died, Jeff. And there's no other place and time in
recorded
history where an event like that has occurred. So... let's... leave it at
that and
move on.

JEFF
Okay.

JOSH
Except to say this...

JEFF
What?

JOSH
Nothing.

JEFF
What?

JOSH
Let's move on.

CUT TO: INT. COMMUNICATIONS OFFICE - DAY
Toby is still happy and passes by. Mandy calls him from inside.

MANDY
Toby.

TOBY
Mandy.

MANDY
You got two seconds?

TOBY
Madeline, you are charming and you are brilliant and for you, I have all
the time in
the world.

MANDY
[to staffers] What's with him?

GINGER
It's the day after his Day of Jubilee.

BONNIE
We've never seen him sustain a good mood this long.

TOBY
Bonnie, you are dedicated and you are beautiful. And Ginger, you are other
nice things.

MANDY
Can I see you inside?

TOBY
You bet.

She pushes him into TOBY'S OFFICE. Toby sets his stuff down on the desk.

TOBY
Mandy, I feel like I've lost a hundred and eighty pounds. I'm smiling. I'm
laughing.
I'm enjoying the people I work with. I gotta snap out of this.
[clears off his leather chair to take a seat] What's on your mind?

MANDY
I want you to help me get the Chinese to give us a new panda bear to replace
Lum-Lum.

TOBY
[long pause] Well, that did the trick.

CUT TO: INT. HALLWAY - DAY
Zoey enters through a door and walks down the hall. She sees Charlie.

ZOEY
Hey.

CHARLIE
Hey, what are you doing here?

ZOEY
C.J. wanted to see me.

CHARLIE
I talked to her, by the way.

ZOEY
Yeah?

CHARLIE
She's said she was going to talk to Danny.

ZOEY
You could have kissed me hello, you know.

CHARLIE
That's what your dorm room is for.

ZOEY
Chicken.

CHARLIE
You'd better believe it. When I kiss you, I want a good two miles between
your mouth
and the Oval Office.

ZOEY
Stacy tells me you're afraid to show me affection in public.

CHARLIE
Tell Stacy to meet me in the middle of Union Station and we'll see how it
goes.

ZOEY
Hey Charlie? Does C.J. have a problem?

CHARLIE
Nope.

ZOEY
I wonder what she wants to see me about then?

CHARLIE
I'm not afraid of being affectionate in public.

Zoey pushes him against the wall and kisses him deeply. He very much
responds. Zoey
walks away, as Charlie smiles.

CHARLIE
See?

Down the hall, Carol greets her.

CAROL
Hi, Zoey. I'll get her.

Carol knocks and pokes her head in C.J.'S OFFICE.

CAROL
C.J.?

C.J.
Yeah.

CAROL
Zoey.

C.J.
Thanks. [puts her papers down]

ZOEY
[comes in] Hey.

C.J.
Hey, Zoey, thanks for stopping by. Carol, can you get the door?

CAROL
Sure.

C.J. walks to the couch as Carol exits and closes the door. Zoey joins
C.J. on the couch.

ZOEY
So I'm assuming you heard I talked to a guy.

C.J.
Edgar Drumm.

ZOEY
Yeah. I know I'm supposed to just walk away, but...

C.J.
But he pushed your buttons a little.

ZOEY
David isn't a drug dealer.

C.J.
Did you tell him that you didn't know that David Arbor was going to be at
the party?

ZOEY
Yeah.

C.J.
Okay... Zoey, I need to know why you lied to him.

ZOEY
I didn't.

C.J.
And I need to know why you're lying to me right now.

ZOEY
C.J....

C.J.
If you didn't know he was going to be there, why'd you have his car keys
with you?

Zoey doesn't answer.

FADE OUT.
END ACT THREE
* * *

ACT FOUR

FADE IN: INT. SECRET SERVICE CONFERENCE ROOM - DAY
Banks of computers and monitors, televisions, and security cameras are
around. Agents
are seated in chairs facing the fronts as Ron Butterfield is heading the
meeting.

BUTTERFIELD
...And Mr. Kleeg is being detained for questioning by field agents in
Albuquerque.
Mr. Derrick Horgiboum. Mr. Horgiboum threatened to blow up the Smithsonian
unless Zoey
Bartlet agreed to meet with him for a drink. Mr. Horgiboum is in custody. And
the
Smithsonian remains open for business. Kelly? You had something?

KELLY
The newest sorority pledge stunt is get your picture taken with Zoey.

MIKE
Here's hoping our biggest threat is from the girls of Kappa Kappa Gamma.

Some laugh.

BUTTERFIELD
It's not. We're adding some hate groups to the list. The Aryan White
Resistance, The
Christian Defense League, The World Church of the Creator, and Central New
York White
Pride.

MIKE
Sir?

BUTTERFIELD
Mike?

MIKE
The Office of Protective Research says the most recent letters have been
signed off
with the slogan, '14 words'.

BUTTERFIELD
Who can tell me what 14 words stands for?

GINA
[raises her hand] We must secure the existence of white people and the future
for
white children.

BUTTERFIELD
That's right. What else do you have, Gina?

GINA
Two death threats were received earlier in the week. One against Zoey,
one against
Charlie. They were made with letters cut from a magazine. And the OPR has
identified
the paper and the typeset as Resistance Magazine.

BUTTERFIELD
This magazine is geared towards recruiting younger people.

GINA
That's right sir. And the letters have repeatedly used the phrase, "Following
the voice
of blood".

BUTTERFIELD
What is it?

GINA
It's the title of the first record by a band called Graceland. They're very
popular
amongst skinheads. Sir, I'm fairly convinced we're looking for two 15-year-old
boys.

BUTTERFIELD
I think you're right. Everyone hit the pictures and see if anyone looks
familiar from
the rope line. Remember it could be anyone. Thank you.

They all get up. A guy comes up to Gina.

GUY
Gina?

GINA
Yeah?

GUY
C.J. Cregg is outside. She'd like to step in.

GINA
Sure.

C.J.
[comes in] Hi.

GINA
Hi, C.J.

C.J.
They told me you were having a briefing. I didn't want to intrude.

GINA
We're done.

C.J.
I just needed a minute.

GINA
You want some coffee?

C.J.
I'm fine. I just needed to talk to you about the party last night.

GINA
[pours a cup for herself] Okay.

C.J.
Could you describe what, if any, contact Zoey might have had with David
Arbor last night?

GINA
No. I'm sorry.

C.J.
I don't understand.

GINA
I'm not permitted to discuss the behavior of my protectee.

C.J.
Zoey's not in trouble.

GINA
I understand.

C.J.
I'm trying to straighten out a discrepancy with what she told me.

GINA
I understand.

C.J.
Gina, I'm the press secretary. There's a story that Zoey's involved with,
and I need you
to tell me what you know about last night.

GINA
I'm sorry, C.J. I can't protect her if she feels she has to do things behind
my back.
I'm not permitted to discuss the behavior of the protectee.

C.J.
Okay, thanks. [starts to leave]

GINA
C.J., the thing with the reporter this morning... it was fast, it was
physical. She's
19 years old and she thought her father was in trouble.

C.J.
Okay. Thanks. I appreciate it. Sorry about the...

GINA
No problem.

C.J.
I'll see you later.

GINA
[sits at her desk] Are you sure you don't want to stay and have some
coffee? I'm going
to stay and look through an FBI photo album of teenage Nazis.

C.J.
Why?

GINA
[smiles] I'm on a break.

C.J.
[smiles] See you later.

CUT TO: INT. SAM'S OFFICE - DAY
Sam and Mallory are still at it. Only now, they've taken off their suit coats.

SAM
It occurs to me Mallory, that you attended a private primary school, a
private high
school and a private college.

MALLORY
What's your point?

SAM
Well, just that liberals have no problem with rich kids going to expensive
private
schools, that doesn't undermine public education. And liberals have no
problem with
middle-class kids going to parochial schools, that doesn't undermine public
education.

MALLORY
Hang on!

SAM
The idea that letting poor public school students choose private alternatives
would
destroy public education is simply contrary to our experience. Boston Latin,
the oldest
public school in America, is still the best secondary school in New England.

MALLORY
Great, but they're not all Boston Latin and Bronx Science, Sam. And since
when are the
liberals the other guys in conversations you have?

There's a knock on the door. C.J. pops in.

C.J.
Excuse me. Hey, Mal.

MALLORY
Hey C.J.

C.J.
[to Sam] You got a second?

SAM
Absolutely. [to Mallory] Excuse me.

SAM goes out into the COMMUNICATIONS OFFICE.

C.J.
Edgar Drumm ambushed Zoey when she was coming out of lunch.

SAM
On campus?

C.J.
Yeah. She said she didn't know David Arbor was going to be there when she
did know
David Arbor was going to be there.

SAM
Why did she lie?

C.J.
Spend all day surrounded by reporters? It starts to become instinct.

SAM
It doesn't sound too bad. Let's just make sure the President doesn't get
involved.

C.J.
Yeah... well... when he hears someone tried to talk to her on campus...

SAM
You're going to have to sit on it.

C.J.
I'm not going to be able to.

SAM
You have to.

C.J.
Sam?

SAM
C.J., you can't back down in front of him. You got to get in his face.

C.J.
Get in the President's face?

SAM
Yeah.

C.J.
That's your advice?

SAM
Yeah.

C.J.
Okay. [turns to others] Does anyone else have any advice... that
could... uh...

SAM
C.J., listen to me. It's your job. It's what he needs you to do.

C.J.
Yes.

SAM
Can I ask you something?

C.J.
Sure.

SAM
I would like to see Mallory socially...

C.J. looks into Sam's office and smiles at Mallory.

SAM
But I can't seem to get her past this fight that we're having.

C.J. turns her body so Mallory can't see either of them and picks up a pencil
from a desk.

C.J.
Tell her you want to continue the fight over lunch.

SAM
That's good.

C.J.
Yeah.

SAM
That's very good advice.

C.J.
Yeah. It's certainly better advice than "get in the President's face."

SAM
I'm going to go back into my office.

C.J.
Cool. I'm going to go check the want ads.

SAM
Good luck.

CUT TO: INT. TOBY'S OFFICE - DAY
Toby is about at the end of his patience.

TOBY
A panda bear to replace Dim Sum?

MANDY
Lum-Lum.

TOBY
Do you mean Hsing-Hsing?

MANDY
Hsing-Hsing. That was his name. Hsing-Hsing. Yeah. Hsing-Hsing was given to
us as a
gift by the Chinese government when Nixon...

TOBY
I know.

MANDY
Then Hsing-Hsing got lonely, so the Chinese sent a mate over, I think,
it's name
was Ping.

TOBY
Ling.

MANDY
Ling.

TOBY
It may have been Ping.

MANDY
Whatever. Ping, or Ling, dies. Hsing-Hsing mourns. Panda bears, it turns out,
mourn.
And for Hsing-Hsing, it seemed like the time was unendurable.

TOBY
I know exactly how he felt.

MANDY
Anyway... as you know, Hsing-Hsing succumbed to liver disease and passed
away earlier
this year.

TOBY
Yes.

MANDY
And I was thinking that it would be a good idea as a symbol to signal how
serious we
are about our relationship with China, if... we asked them for another bear.

TOBY
I think it would be a good idea, as a symbol... to signal that China is
serious about
their relationship with us, if they stopped running over their citizens with
tanks.

MANDY
Toby...

TOBY
Mandy! Call the embassy and have them send us over a damn bear. What's the
problem?

MANDY
First of all, pandas are very rare. There are maybe a thousand of them and
they're
only in China.

TOBY
We only need one.

MANDY
We need two.

TOBY
Why?

MANDY
Because the other one will get lonely.

TOBY
The other one will get lonely. Well then have them send us two.

MANDY
And second of all, China's not inclined to give us gifts right now.

TOBY
Then get us two regular bears, a bucket of black paint, a bucket of white
paint,
bam, bam, next case.

MANDY
It's hard to believe that the wildlife lobby was nervous about you.

TOBY
I know. I'm Mr. Wildlife.

MANDY
Toby...

TOBY
Mandy!

They stare at each other.

TOBY
What made you think I'd be interested in this?

MANDY
Josh said you were my man.

TOBY
Josh.

MANDY
Yeah.

TOBY
Said I was your man.

MANDY
Yes.

TOBY
[thinks it over] Oh... I have to say, Mandy... I'm impressed with how much
you've grown.

MANDY
What do you mean?

TOBY
Well, there was a time if you got played by Josh like this, you'd want to
get back at
him right away, and it's good to see you rise above that.

MANDY
What do you mean played?

TOBY
He used you to have a little fun with me 'cause he has to deal with
Breckenridge on
slavery reparations.

MANDY
He played me?

TOBY
Yeah, but it's good to see you get past that.

MANDY
He played me?

TOBY
Like a two-dollar banjo.

MANDY
[thinks, quietly] Help me.

TOBY
Do what?

MANDY
Cause Josh pain.

TOBY
Hmm... Okay.

CUT TO: INT. LEO'S OFFICE - DAY
Leo is on the phone when Mallory and Sam come in.

MALLORY
Hey, Dad.

LEO
Yeah. [into phone] Hold on, please.

MALLORY
[barrels on anyway] Dad, I'm sorry, but Sam's asked me to have lunch with
him and
I need your permission.

Leo tells his call to hang on and puts the phone down.

LEO
What do you need my permission to have lunch for?

MALLORY
Sam?

SAM
She says she always asks her father's permission before she has lunch with
fascists.

LEO
Oh. Yeah, okay.

MALLORY
He's in favor of school vouchers, Dad.

LEO
No, Mallory. He's really not.

MALLORY
Yes, he is.

LEO
No, he's not.

MALLORY
I read the position paper.

LEO
It's opposition prep.

MALLORY
Opposition prep?

LEO
When we're gearing up for a debate, we have the smart guys take the other
side.

MALLORY
[to Sam] You stood there and argued with me.

SAM
Yes.

MALLORY
Why?

SAM
You made an appointment.

MALLORY
Sam...

LEO
Would the two of you take it outside?

SAM
I thought you were trying to drive a wedge between us.

LEO
Yeah, but now you're just boring the crap out of me.

MALLORY
Hey...

SAM
Mallory, education is the silver bullet. Education is everything. We don't
need little
changes. We need gigantic monumental changes. Schools should be palaces. The
competition
for the best teachers should be fierce. They should be making six-figure
salaries.
School should be incredibly expensive for government and absolutely free of
charge to
its citizens, just like national defense. That's my position. I just haven't
figured
out how to do it yet.

MALLORY
[softened] You stood there and argued with me.

SAM
And we can continue the argument. But it's lunchtime now. We're going to
have lunch.

MALLORY
You're taking over?

SAM
I'm taking over.

MALLORY
Dad?

LEO
Yes, you may go have lunch with the fascist.

MALLORY
Come along, Sam.

MALLORY leaves.

LEO
You're doing fine.

SAM
Okay. [leaves]

CUT TO: INT. THE OVAL OFFICE - DAY
Bartlet is laying on one of the couches reading. Charlie comes in.

CHARLIE
Mr. President.

BARTLET
Charlie.

CHARLIE
Sir, you know your lunch with Mr. Girardi got canceled.

BARTLET
I heard. It's the first time anyone's canceled lunch on me since I took
office.

CHARLIE
I'm sure Mr. Girardi meant no offense, sir. He was taken to the hospital
with pneumonia.

BARTLET
I'm not saying he didn't have a good excuse.

CHARLIE
What are you reading?

BARTLET
Rules of Civility and Decent Behavior in Company and Conversation by George
Washington.

CHARLIE
The George Washington?

BARTLET
The rules were drawn from an English translation of a French book of
maxims. Washington
copied them down when he was 14 years old. [reads] "When you sit down,
keep your feet
firm and even, without putting one on the other or crossing them. Put not
off your
clothes in the presence of others, nor go out of your chamber
half-dressed." What a
tightassed little priss he must've been.

CHARLIE
Yes, sir.

BARTLET
[takes off her glasses and regards Charlie] Do you think I could take George
Washington?

CHARLIE
Take him at what, sir?

BARTLET
I don't know... a war?

CHARLIE
Could you have taken George Washington in a war?

BARTLET
Yeah.

CHARLIE
Well, you'd have the Air Force and he'd have the Minutemen, right?

BARTLET
The Minutemen were good.

CHARLIE
Still, I think you could probably take him.

BARTLET
Yeah. [winks and puts his glasses back on to read]

CHARLIE
C.J.'s here.

BARTLET
You can send her in.

Charlie leaves and C.J. comes in.

BARTLET
C.J.

C.J.
Mr. President.

BARTLET
[reads] "When in company, put not your hands on any part of your body not
usually
covered."

C.J.
Well... I do what it takes to keep the press corps happy, Mr. President.

Bartlet puts the book on the coffee table and sits up. C.J. sits on the
couch opposite
the table.

BARTLET
Yeah, you're right. What's going on?

C.J.
Don't blow your stack, all right?

BARTLET
What is going on?

C.J.
Zoey lied to a reporter.

BARTLET
What are you talking about?

C.J.
She was asked should the President's daughter be partying with drug dealers
and she
said she didn't know David Arbor was going to be at the party. Except she
did know.

BARTLET
Why did she lie?

C.J.
She didn't have to.

BARTLET
Then why did she?

C.J.
'Cause sometimes 19 year-old girls lie when they don't have to.

BARTLET
She never has to.

C.J.
She knows that.

BARTLET
Apparently she doesn't.

C.J.
Mr. President... give her a break. This thing's happened to her friend,
she doesn't
know how it affects her father. Edgar Drumm is shouting at her while she
comes out
of class. She choked.

BARTLET
[gets riled] A reporter talked to her on campus?

C.J.
Mr. President...

BARTLET
C.J.!

C.J.
Sir...

BARTLET
[starts to put on his shoes] Put the press in the briefing room. Tell them
I'm coming
right over.

C.J.
No.

BARTLET
C.J....

C.J.
No sir.

BARTLET
We have been over this and we have been over this and we have been over
this! They are
not supposed to talk to my daughter on campus.

C.J.
It was Edgar Drumm.

BARTLET
I don't give a damn if it was the Bergen County Shopper's Guide. I want to
talk to the
press.

C.J.
You can't talk to the press!

BARTLET
Watch me.

C.J.
I'm telling you now, Mr. President, this isn't about your daughter! It's
about the first
daughter and that's my job and you're not going down there! You, me, Charlie
and Zoey
are the only four people who know she was lying and there's no reason it
doesn't need
to stay that way. It's a non-story. You go down there and it's a big story!

Bartlet has his hand on the doorknob and takes a breath. Then turns around.

BARTLET
So I just sit in my office and fume?

C.J.
Yes. And if anybody asks you, you haven't heard anything about it.

BARTLET
Fine.

C.J.
Mr. President?

BARTLET
What?

C.J.
Did you know he jumped out at Zoey? Gina Toscano put him into a wall?

BARTLET
Excellent.

C.J.
Sir...

BARTLET
I haven't heard anything about it.

C.J.
Very good.

BARTLET
I could take George Washington, by the way.

C.J.
Yes, sir.

BARTLET
Anything else?

C.J.
No, sir.

BARTLET
Thank you, C.J.

C.J.
Thank you, Mr. President. [leaves]

CUT TO: INT. JOSH'S OFFICE - DAY
Jeff and Josh are still in the meeting. Jeff is pacing, Josh is sitting with
his feet
on his desk.

JEFF
How 'bout the Japanese?

JOSH
I knew you were going to bring up the Japanese.

JEFF
We gave 1.2 billion to Japanese-Americans who were in internment camps.

JOSH
They were actually in internment camps. Bring me a living slave and then
you've got a case.

JEFF
I think I've got a case without the living slave, but I'm just a civil rights
expert,
so what do I know?

JOSH
Jeff, the committee is going to be looking for a certain degree of
practicality. We don't
have $1.7 trillion. To raise $1.7 trillion, we would have to sell Texas and
the U.S. Navy.

JEFF
I understand the predicament and I'm willing to give you a break. We'll take
our money
in tax deductions and scholarship funds, how 'bout that?

JOSH
How about you take it in affirmative action and empowerment zones and civil
rights acts?

JEFF
Three things which we wouldn't have needed in the first place.

JOSH
[stands, getting ticked] You know, Jeff... I'd love to give you the money,
I really
would. But I'm a little short of cash right now. It seems the S.S. officer
forgot to
give my grandfather his wallet back when he let him out of Birkenau.

JEFF
Well, your beef's with the Germans.

JOSH
You're damn right it is!

Josh pauses and looks at his father's picture in the wall.

JOSH
What the hell are we talking about?

He sits back down again. So does Jeff.

JEFF
We have laws in this country. You break them, you pay your fine. You break
God's laws,
that's a different story. You can't kidnap a civilization and sell them into
slavery.
No amount of money will make up for it, and all you have to do is look,
200 years later,
at race relations in this country.

JOSH
Yes.

JEFF
No amount of money will make up for it.

JOSH
Yes.

JEFF
You got a dollar?

JOSH
Yeah.

JEFF
Take it out. Look at the back.

Josh does.

JEFF
The seal, the pyramid, it's unfinished. With the eye of God looking over
it. And the
words Annuit Coeptis. He, God, Favors our Undertaking. The seal is meant to
be
unfinished, because this country's meant to be unfinished. We're meant to
keep doing
better. We're meant to keep discussing and debating and we're meant to read
books by
great historical scholars and then talk about them, which is why I lent my
name to a
dust cover. I want to be your Assistant Attorney General for Civil Rights. I'll
do an
outstanding job for all people in this country. You got any problem with me
saying all
that to the committee?

JOSH
No.

JEFF
Good. You hungry?

JOSH
Yeah.

JEFF
Let me buy you lunch.

JOSH
Yeah, okay. [stands] Hey, Jeff.

JEFF
Yeah.

They put on their coats.

JOSH
There's going to be a lot of these meetings before your confirmation. Why
don't you let
me get lunch this time, you get it next time?

JEFF
Yeah, okay.

JOSH
Hey Suzanne.

Josh and Jeff walk out the door.

DISSOLVE TO: END CREDITS.
FADE TO BLACK.
THE END
* * *

The West Wing and all its characters are properties of Aaron Sorkin, John
Wells
Production, Warner Brothers Television, and NBC. No copyright infringement
is intended.

Episode 1.18 -- 'Six Meetings Before Lunch'
Original Airdate: April 5, 1999, 9:OO PM EST

Transcript By: Jo

This Post Has One Comment

  1. chris

    The script for this episode includes the lyrics for “The Jackal” that C.J. lip syncs to.

Leave a Reply