At the First Lady’s (Stockard Channing) urging, Josh (Bradley Whitford) meets with a powerful women’s caucus over the proposed language of a U.N. treaty banning prostitution while the President (Martin Sheen) grapples with the possibility of a Mad Cow epidemic and ponders how much the public should know. Meanwhile, staffers are stunned at C.J.’s (Allison Janney) emotional outburst concerning the administration’s renewal of its air base lease in a Mideast country that abuses its women. Some World War II veterans come to the White House to protest a pending Pearl Harbor exhibit at the Smithsonian and Bartlet is sued by an angry woman who intends to raise a public fuss over his remarks regarding the hot-potato issue of a national seat belt law.
THE WEST WING "THE WOMEN OF QUMAR" TELEPLAY BY: AARON SORKIN STORY BY: FELICIA WILSON & LAURA GLASSER & JULIA DAHL DIRECTED BY: ALEX GRAVES TEASER FADE IN: INT. THE BRIEFING ROOM - DAY C.J. is at the press briefing. C.J. Katie. KATIE C.J., do you know anything about the President being sued? C.J. Sued? KATIE There was an item in the Rocky Mountain Something Bugler- REPORTER Bugle. KATIE The Rocky Mountain Bugle- REPORTER It's the Herald. KATIE The Rocky Mountain Herald. C.J. About the President being sued? KATIE Unless this person was making it up... C.J. looks perplexed. C.J. Okay, that's all everybody. I'll see you at five. She walks out with Carol to the HALLWAY. C.J. You haven't heard anything about that, have you? CAROL About what? C.J. About the President being sued? CAROL It's the news, isn't it? C.J. What are you-? CAROL The Rocky Mountain News? C.J. speaks to Toby as he appears and Carol exits. C.J. Toby- TOBY There's a group, a veterans' group that's talking about not showing up for the anniversary. C.J. Which group? TOBY I don't know. C.J. Why aren't they going to show up? TOBY They're talking about not showing up. C.J. Why? TOBY I don't know. C.J. Do you know anything about the President being sued? TOBY No. Why? C.J. Katie Witt seems to think there was an item in the Rocky Mountain News. TOBY I thought it was the Bugler. C.J. It's not. TOBY I don't know anything about it. C.J. Okay. C.J. doubles back in the other direction. Toby keeps walking and talks to Ginger as the two enter the COMMUNICATIONS OFFICE. TOBY Ginger. GINGER Yes? TOBY Have you set up a meeting for me? GINGER Yes. TOBY With the veterans' group? GINGER Yes. TOBY The one that's talking about not coming? GINGER Yes. TOBY You haven't yet, have you? GINGER [crestfallen] No. TOBY But you will? GINGER Yes. Toby enters SAM'S OFFICE. TOBY Sam? SAM The President's being sued? TOBY Did you get this from the Rocky Mountain? SAM I got this from the DoJ, civil addition. Three months ago at a fundraiser the President was asked about airbags. Someone suggested they're more dangerous than benefits. The President says, and I'm quoting, 'Everything has risks. Your car can drive into a lake and your seatbelt jams, but no one's saying don't wear your seat belt.' TOBY Don't tell me! SAM That someone thought that's what he was saying? A couple at the fundraiser got into an accident. He wasn't wearing his seat belt, he died. She's suing for contributory negligence. TOBY You can't sue the President. SAM You can get rich trying to figure out how. We should do something preemptive. TOBY It's not going to be a big deal. SAM Isn't that what we say right before something becomes a big deal? BARTLET [yells from behind them as they enter the hallway] Toby! TOBY Yes? SAM Good morning, sir. TOBY Morning, Mr. President. BARTLET Come with me for a second, would you? TOBY Sir, it's possible you're going to hear some stuff about seatbelts today. I urge you to ignore it. BARTLET No problem. Are you straightening things out with the Smithsonian? TOBY Today. BARTLET I'm supposed to speak at the opening of an exhibit marking the sixtieth anniversary of Pearl Harbor, but there's a small veterans' group that objects to the exhibit on the grounds that it's America bashing. FRANK [to Toby] I thought you liked America bashing. TOBY I wouldn't say that. FRANK What would you say? TOBY I wouldn't. They all enter THE OVAL OFFICE. TOBY Sir, you needed me? BARTLET Frank, what was added? FRANK Hutchison just told us that two F-117s strike fighters have been added to the package. TOBY This is Qumar? BARTLET Yeah FRANK That means the total is 15 M-Rams, 50 M-1A1s, 10 F14s, 2 F-117s strike fighters, and a PAC 3 missile. TOBY There's no way I'll remember that, can you send someone a memo? FRANK Yeah. TOBY This is in exchange for a five-year lease. FRANK Ten year lease agreement. BARTLET The point is that we've dotted the I's and we're ready to announce. TOBY I'll let C.J. know. BARTLET Let C.J. know but have her pass it off to the DoD. TOBY You want to bury it? BARTLET Not totally. TOBY But passing it off to another department is usually our way of signaling we don't want the public to care about it. BARTLET I don't know, every time we make one of these deals with a place like Qumar I feel the women around here look at me funny. TOBY I think you're probably wrong about that. BARTLET You think it's just guilt? TOBY Yes, sir. BARTLET Well how should I deal with guilt? TOBY Be more like me. BARTLET [laughing a little] Yeah, okay. TOBY Anything else, sir? BARTLET C.J.'s going to be cool with this, right? TOBY C.J.'s the one you're worried about? BARTLET I'm just saying she knows who the good guys are, right? TOBY Yeah. BARTLET Okay, thanks. TOBY Thank you, Mr. President. BARTLET What's next? SMASH CUT TO: MAIN TITLES. END TEASER * * * ACT ONE FADE IN: INT. JOSH'S OFFICE - DAY Donna walks into Josh's office. DONNA Josh? JOSH Could I get five minutes without being interrupted by banality? Dr. Bartlet gets wheeled in. ABBEY It's not banality, it's the boss's wife. JOSH [rising, a little startled] Morning, ma'am. ABBEY Morning, Josh. JOSH [to Donna] A little head's up wouldn't be out of line. DONNA [as she leaves] I said Josh. JOSH What can I do for you, ma'am? ABBEY I got a letter from Amy Gardner. JOSH Yeah, I was cc'd on that letter. ABBEY She seems pretty irate. JOSH [sitting again] Amy Gardner's always irate about something, I wouldn't give it a lot of thought. ABBEY I happen to agree with her. JOSH Me too, and I think it deserves a lot of thought. ABBEY I thought you might. JOSH I was kidding. ABBEY I don't care. The letter was co-signed by NOW, the Women's Action League, and about ten women's groups. I've got to go to Vienna next week. JOSH Honestly, ma'am, due respect, I think they're overreacting. We're talking about one word. ABBEY Isn't this one word that dramatically alters the effectiveness of the treaty? JOSH I don't know how dramatically... ABBEY The current draft says "forced prostitution." JOSH Yes. ABBEY Excluding all other types of prostitution and sex trafficking? JOSH Well, I suppose that's for prosecutors to... ABBEY Well, Amy says that unless the UN removes the word 'forced,' it's going to be difficult to prosecute at all. JOSH You've spoken with her? ABBEY Yes. And I'd like you to do the same. JOSH God.... Really? [with a really forced smile] ABBEY See? Now you're wishing it had been banality. JOSH Yes I am. ABBEY Have a good day. JOSH [rising as she is wheeled out] Thank you ma'am. CUT TO: INT. THE ROOSEVELT ROOM - DAY Leo enters. A number of men are waiting. LEO Thanks for waiting. MAN Leo, you know everybody. These are Doctors Bedrosien and Califf. This is Leo McGarry. LEO How you doing? DOCTORS Fine. LEO And why are we here? BEDROSIEN A herd of cattle in Ogalala, Nebraska, was accidentally given banned feed and quarantined 18 months ago. CALIFF One of the cattle showed neurological damage. It was unable to stand - it's called a Downer Cow. BEDROSIEN Tissue was sent to the NVSL in Ames, Iowa for the first round of tests. Another sample was sent to the UK's Central Veterinary Labratory. LEO And? BEDROSIEN The first round of Iowa tissue showed a presumptive positive. LEO Mad cow? BEDROSIEN We don't know that. LEO But we think? CALIFF We have to wait for the UK tests. LEO Worst case scenario? CALIFF We declare a national emergency and a class one recall. Mr. McGarry, we've tested over twelve thousand samples and none of them have come up positive. LEO Twelve thousand out of how many? CALIFF Forty million adult cattle. LEO Somebody needs to teach me about this. CUT TO: INT. C.J.'S OFFICE - DAY The room is full of staffers, including Toby. C.J. What's next? MAN We'll need a response to Kendall's charge in the Weekly Standard. C.J. What's he say? MAN Our education reauthorization bill has more pork than a pig-picking festival. C.J. A pig-picking festival? MAN Yeah. C.J. More and more I'm in favor of English being the national language. MARK It's worth knowing that Kendall's pushing for four new charter schools in his district, one of which is... C.J. Named after him? MARK Yes. C.J. Thank you, Santa. How about...? TOBY It's pretty hard to get at the pork when the Chairman's hogging the trough. MARK And that's why he gets all the great women. C.J. What else? TOBY You better be briefed on the arms sale to Qumar cause the Pentagon leaked it. C.J. Qumar? TOBY Yeah C.J. In the Gulf? MARK Is there another one? TOBY No. We lease an air base in Qumar. It's a ten-year lease and it's up and they won't renew without an arms package. Are you writing this down? C.J. No, when did we make an arms deal with Qumar? TOBY I really don't know. What does it matter? C.J. What does it matter? TOBY Yeah C.J. What are we selling? TOBY Don't start... C.J. What are we selling? TOBY [to a staffer] What are we selling? WOMAN 15 M-Rams, 50 M-1A1s tank kits, 10 F15s and patriot missiles for $1.5 billion and they renew the lease. C.J. Don't start?! What the hell...? Toby gives her a look. C.J. Anything else? ALL No C.J. Thank you. Toby exits, meets and walks with Sam. SAM This is how it starts. TOBY What? SAM Trouble. This is how trouble starts. TOBY Seat belts? SAM Contributory negligence in a wrongful death is the tort equivalent of murder. TOBY And aren't lawsuits against the President the tort equivalent of insane? SAM Toby... TOBY Like the guy who's suing the President to stop CIA-sponsored radio transmissions in his bridgework? SAM Yes TOBY Or the guy who's suing to have the man from the planet Xanadu removed from his front yard? SAM That's not local? TOBY It's federal. There's the couple suing for repayment of all back taxes ever because taxes are unconstitutional. SAM Technically they are. TOBY Sam... SAM They're not. TOBY And the bow-tie manufacturer from the garment district who blames the falling market on the fact that the President doesn't wear bow-ties. SAM There's a reason the civil division gave us a heads-up. TOBY What? SAM This one could break. One random comment and that's the ball game. Thank you for coming to Dodger Stadium. TOBY You think murder is going to overtake education and health care on the campaign trail? SAM No, you're right, because health care and education are much sexier. TOBY What do you suggest? SAM That we come out right now for a national seatbelt law. TOBY Wait, wait, better yet. Why doesn't he set up his own checkpoint on I-95? SAM Cause that's impractical. TOBY [walking away] So's twisting national policy over a non-story. SAM [walking into the bullpen] It's not going to be a non-story. GINGER Are you talking to me? SAM No. CUT TO: INT. THE OVAL OFFICE - DAY Bartlet is just entering the office. BARTLET Hey. CHARLIE Good morning, Mr. President. BARTLET Did the Celtics win last night? CHARLIE No, they got crushed. BARTLET Okay, when I say did they win, you can just say yes or no. CHARLIE They got pretty well crushed. BARTLET What are you doing? CHARLIE I'm sorry, sir, I had a few minutes. BARTLET I'm not on you, I'm just asking. CHARLIE I'm making notes for a final in modern American history, the consumer movements in late 20th century America. BARTLET Modern American history sucks. CHARLIE I had a hunch. BARTLET You want to study history, study the Crusades, the fall of the Roman Empire from Theoddoseus to Justinian. CHARLIE The Visigoths. BARTLET Damn right the Visigoths. Modern history's another name for television. CHARLIE Yes, sir. BARTLET Is there any way I can help? CHARLIE No thank you, sir. BARTLET I'm a master of modern history, you can ask me anything. CHARLIE What year did we pass the Clean Water Act? BARTLET [pausing] I don't know. CHARLIE Okay. LEO [entering] Good morning. BARTLET They said you needed to see me. LEO Yeah. BARTLET What's going on? LEO I'm going to tell you. C.J. Good morning, Mr. President. BARTLET Hey. LEO Sir, at this moment we're waiting to hear from the UK on confirmation of a test for mad cow. BARTLET Oh man, they got it again? Leo and C.J. share a look. LEO No, sir. I mean a US case. BARTLET [pause] A US case? LEO Yeah. Right now it's what's called a presumptive positive. England will come back with definitive answers. BARTLET How long? LEO 72 hours. BARTLET Do we say anything in the meantime? LEO That's my question. [to C.J.] That's why you're here. C.J. I think we have to. I put the Secretary in the briefing room with experts from the University of Maryland, the National Cattlemen's Beef Association, they lay out the facts, soften up the ground. LEO No, in three days we have our facts straight, we can make a full disclosure. C.J. In the meanwhile... LEO In the meanwhile, the USDA takes the time for tracing, checking feed logs, herd movements. We don't know how many herds are going to need to be quarantined. C.J. We also don't know how many people know about this already. LEO Nobody knows. C.J. There's at least a rancher who knows, the labs in Iowa and England, whoever the USDA... LEO They're our labs in Iowa, and the rancher doesn't have any interest in telling the world his cattle are sick. BARTLET Yeah, we got to wait. C.J. Sir... BARTLET The second we say positive, beef futures collapse, and we lose 3.6 billion in beef exports. Fast food is deserted, supermarkets pull beef, it's panic - I want to talk to some more people, but in the meantime, we wait. LEO Thank you, sir. C.J. Thank you, Mr. President. Leo and C.J. quickly walk to LEO'S OFFICE. C.J. Want to see panic? LEO Hang on... Leo shuts all the doors in his office. C.J. Want to see panic, let the story break on CNN. LEO Waiting buys us time to get some reassuring answers. C.J. I don't know how many more times we can get caught keeping a secret. LEO Sometimes that's what we're supposed to do. C.J. [about to exit] All right. LEO Thanks. C.J. [turning back] Listen. LEO Yeah. C.J. Not for nothing, but three weeks ago a woman in Qumar was executed for adultery. She didn't need a lawyer 'cause there wasn't any trial, it was her husband's word against hers. LEO Yeah. C.J. Later today I'm going to be announcing that we're selling them tanks and guns. Leo makes a hand gesture like 'What do you want me to say?' C.J. Okay. C.J. exits his office and walks into the hallway. FADE OUT. END ACT ONE * * * ACT TWO FADE IN: INT. WOMEN'S LEADERSHIP COALITION OFFICES - DAY Josh is sitting in a waiting area, looking up at the artwork. A secretary is behind the reception desk. SECRETARY Amy should be with you in just a minute. JOSH Thanks. He gets up and walks around. JOSH This is interesting art on the walls. A lot of very strong women who could hurt me. SECRETARY Only if you provoke them. JOSH Yeah. SECRETARY You know, I'm sure she's busy with something very important or she wouldn't make you wait. In the hallway to the left, AMY GARDNER appears and calls on Josh. AMY GARDNER Special J! JOSH Amy. AMY Thanks for waiting, I was playing a little Nintendo. Josh follows her as she leads him to her office. JOSH Yeah. AMY I'm kidding. I was on a conference call. You want anything? Coke, Pepsi, shrimp cocktail? JOSH No. AMY How you been? JOSH Good. AMY Good. Amy gives him a seductive look while pointing to a map in her office. AMY You know what this is? JOSH A map of global trafficking in prostitution? AMY Yeah. You know who drew it? JOSH Amerigo Vespucci? AMY No, but that's funny, J. It was your State Department. JOSH It's your State Department, too, Amy. AMY Yeah, a little more yours than mine. JOSH Yeah, every time you write a letter to the First Lady she gets into gear because she feels guilty that she's not doing enough for women. AMY She's not doing enough for women. JOSH And what would you like? AMY I'm glad you asked. JOSH Not half as glad as I am. AMY The current draft of the document says only forced prostitution and not other types of prostitution is sexual exploitation. JOSH Yes. AMY What about someone who answers an ad for an au pair and ends up working a 15-hour shift in a whore house where they're held hostage and can never pay off their debt? JOSH Yeah. AMY That's not the worst-case scenario. The worst-case scenario was five days ago when four 13-year-old Thai girls were found having hanged themselves in an abandoned house in Stony Crest Lane in Bethesda. JOSH Yeah AMY Not halfway around the world, Bethesda. AMY There were sheets over the windows, triple locks on the doors, no phone, handcuffs hanging off the bedposts. For the price of a four-slice toaster their parents had sold them to work as babysitters. JOSH How is that not forced prostitution? AMY I've got a whole floor full of lawyers who... In the last, in the last two years, a hundred thousand women, and by women I'm including girls who should be playing with Easy Bake ovens, a hundred thousand in the last two years were brought here and forced to work as prostitutes. You know how many of these cases we prosecuted? JOSH Not enough. AMY Two hundred fifty. You guys are about to go to Vienna and make it harder so yeah, I dropped the First Lady a note. JOSH [noticing something by her desk] What the hell are those? AMY Those are balloon animals. JOSH I'm sorry? AMY They're balloon animals. I have nephews who like balloon animals so I got someone to teach me. JOSH Are they abstract? AMY I'm a beginner! JOSH We can't drop the one word. AMY Why? JOSH Because we're not the only ones living in the world. Prostitution is legal in Germany, Turkey, the Netherlands, and if we alienate these countries... AMY So then don't sign the treaty. JOSH The more countries who sign the treaty the more effective it is. AMY The more toothless the treaty is, the more toothless it is. JOSH That's a permeating syllogism to be sure . AMY Hey I'm not screwing around. The women's vote isn't just half your constituency, it's the entire margin of victory. JOSH Who else are you going to vote for? AMY I don't know, but in the meantime I don't think you've appointed enough women to the Federal bench, so... JOSH Amy... AMY Yeah, we'd hold up your other nominations. [with a little seductive smile on her face] I didn't burn my bras, J. In fact, I like my bras. I ring your bell when it's important. JOSH All right. AMY Would you get back to me before the end of the day and let me know where we are? JOSH Yeah. AMY Thank you. JOSH The art around here scares the hell out of me. AMY That's what it's supposed to do. Amy gives him a big smile as Josh leaves, of course not without looking back. CUT TO: INT. THE WHITE HOUSE, CONFERENCE ROOM - DAY Toby enters a room where two Smithsonian Curators, EVAN WOODKIRK and MARY KLEIN wait. TOBY Good morning. Thanks for waiting. EVAN WOODKIRK How are you, Toby? Evan Woodkirk. TOBY Good to see you. MARY KLINE Mary Kline. TOBY Tell me why I'm talking to you. EVAN The Smithsonian is opening an exhibit marking the 60th anniversary of Pearl Harbor. TOBY And why is that making veterans unhappy? EVAN Well, let's be clear, the USF is a very small group, maybe 2,000 members and only 30 of them are going to be attending. TOBY They're not attending anymore, they're boycotting. MARY It's not like we're not going to be able to fill those 30 seats at the opening. We don't see it as a problem. TOBY Well, the President's speaking at the opening, so it's a bit of a problem because these guys aren't going to keep their unhappiness to themselves. I don't care if there are 2,000 or 20, I don't want the President where there are pissed-off veterans. EVAN They have nothing to be concerned about. TOBY Tell me what they're going to tell me when I meet with them this afternoon. EVAN They'll tell you they're troubled by the commentary on the propaganda posters. TOBY Which is? EVAN Sorry? TOBY The commentary. MARY These were fear-inspiring posters. They were incredibly racist. TOBY And you say so in the commentary? EVAN In so many words? TOBY Yeah MARY Toby, "The Sowers" portrays the Japanese as hulking barbarians, tossing human skulls onto the ground. TOBY How about the exhibit titled "America's Vengeance?" EVAN So you've reviewed the material? TOBY "Vengeance" is pretty provocative, especially when followed by the burnt contents of a child's lunch box? Of course I've reviewed the material. Knock at the door. LEO Excuse me, I'm sorry, do you have a moment? TOBY Yeah. Toby meets Leo outside in the HALLWAY. LEO I want to you to get with C.J. when you can. TOBY Sure. Why? LEO A lab in the UK is going to let us know in 72 hours if the first US case of mad cow is in Nebraska right now. We got a presumptive positive on- TOBY 72 hours? LEO Yeah. TOBY We should keep it to ourselves. LEO That's what I think. C.J. disagrees. The President wants to hear more. TOBY Okay. LEO Thanks. Toby walks back into the room. We stay with Leo, who meets Sam. They walk. SAM Leo. LEO Yeah. SAM You know the President's being sued, right? LEO I'm sorry? SAM The President's being sued. LEO Oh, the guy from the Planet Zanzibar. SAM Xanadu. No, the seatbelts. LEO Yeah, I saw. That's not going to be anything. SAM The Washington Times' running it under the headline "Bartlet Accused of Contributory Negligence." LEO I didn't know The Washington Times could spell all those words. SAM Yep, A-29 above the fold. LEO There's a fold that deep in the paper? SAM Look, after three, four, five days, it's going to be picked up by the Post and the New York Times. Let's be ahead of it. LEO How? SAM Come out for a national seatbelt law. LEO A national seatbelt law's never going to happen. SAM Why? LEO What's the most important State in the primaries? SAM New Hampshire. LEO What's the most important State in the general? SAM Michigan. LEO What's the only State without a mandatory seatbelt law? SAM New Hampshire. LEO And where do they make the cars? SAM Fair enough. Can I explore it? LEO Knock yourself out. In fact, go ahead and knock yourself out. SAM Yeah. CUT TO: INT. JOSH'S OFFICE - DAY Josh enters his office and meets up with Donna. JOSH It's bluster. The appointments aren't going to be held up. At least not by Lady Godiva. DONNA Tell me she wasn't bare-breasted, at least outside of your imagination. JOSH No, she was, yeah. I'm saying, if she wants to front off it's not like there's a moral imperative for the White House to get behind, what? DONNA Equity and- JOSH Equity and insurance coverage for contraception or whatever it is the ladies want. More money for sewing notions and whatnot. DONNA Suffrage, for instance, and the right to smoke. JOSH If she wants to throw heat, we can hold back a few months on the backing for the Child Support Enforcement Act. DONNA But you don't want to do that? JOSH Of course I don't want to do that, Donna, I'm a friend of the working mom. DONNA You want her to have sewing notions. JOSH I do. DONNA Can I ask you something? JOSH Yeah. DONNA Do you think it's possible there's a broader point? JOSH No. Why? Why? DONNA That leaving the word 'forced' in the treaty condones consensual prostitution? JOSH That's ridiculous. DONNA I'm saying it could be spun that way. JOSH That we condone prostitution? DONNA Yeah. JOSH It can't be spun that way. DONNA Okay. JOSH You think it can? DONNA I just did. JOSH All right. All right, would you check if C.J.'s in her office? CUT TO: INT. CONFERENCE ROOM - DAY MARY Toby, it's not like the entire exhibit is anti-American... EVAN Hang on, it's not like any of the exhibit is anti-American. I can't believe I have to have this conversation with you of all people. TOBY Well I don't know what 'me of all people' means, but... EVAN Aren't you the one always standing by the NEA when... TOBY I'm not. This is different from the NEA. EVAN How? TOBY It is. For one thing, the President's being asked to speak, which is the only reason I can have you sitting here in the first place. Listen, uh, something's come up, and I'm done if you're done, so... EVAN I appreciate your time. TOBY I appreciate yours. Can I call later today? EVAN Please. CUT TO: INT. C.J.'S OFFICE - DAY Josh walks up. C.J. Yeah? JOSH How you doing? C.J. Fine. JOSH So I just came from seeing Amy Gardner. C.J. Yeah, how'd it go? JOSH I showed her who's boss. C.J. Who'd it turn out to be? JOSH It's still unclear, but let me ask you something. The UN treaty, Vienna. If we have to make a to-do about it being forced prostitution, isn't there a chance it could be spun that we're condoning prostitution? C.J. Yeah. JOSH How much of a chance? C.J. It'll happen. JOSH Cause Amy'll make it happen. C.J. Yeah. JOSH Well, this is a whole new thing then... TOBY [appearing at the door] Leo told me. C.J. Close the door. JOSH Told you what? C.J. Close the door. Toby closes the door. C.J. There was a presumptive positive on some cattle in Nebraska. JOSH What does that mean? C.J. We have to wait 72 hours for a test. JOSH You're talking about a disease? C.J. Yeah. JOSH You're kidding me. C.J. No. JOSH Mad cow? C.J. Yeah. JOSH Oh my god, you're kidding me! C.J. Really, no. JOSH I guess if the door's closed we're not saying anything yet? TOBY That's what we're here to talk about. JOSH What do you think? C.J. You know we have an extra 1.5 billion dollars we weren't counting on? TOBY What? C.J. There's an extra 1.5 billion. In Qumar, when a woman gets raped, she'll generally get beaten by her husband and sons as a punishment so at some point we should talk about how to spend the 1.5 billion they're giving us. She walks over to her desk and sits. C.J. Okay, so, should we tell anybody? FADE OUT. END ACT TWO * * * ACT THREE FADE IN: INT. THE OVAL OFFICE - DAY Bartlet is in a meeting with advisors in the Oval Office. BARTLET [reading] All right. Unfunded mandates. LEO This is where the federal government forces localities to do stuff that isn't at all interested in paying the bill. BARTLET Don't give me their grumbles. MAN According to Frank Siegel, Danville, Virginia with a population of 55,000 spent 13,800 staff hours and $176,000 complying with the Americans with Disabilities Act. BARTLET Are employees in wheelchairs supposed to work in the parking lot? MAN No, sir. Siegel thinks it's unfair that the federal government- BARTLET How much would it cost the federal government to amend the unfunded mandates we format to cover all unfunded mandates? MAN Tens of billions, I would think. BARTLET Let's find out for sure then tell Siegel to sit down and shut up. MAN Yes, sir. LEO Anything else? BARTLET No. ADVISORS Thank you, Mr. President. Leo shuts the door behind them leaving and goes back to sit beside Bartlet, where they sit leaning in to each other. BARTLET So paint a picture for me, would you? LEO We find the source of the problem, which'll be the feed. We buy the cattle and slaughter them. BARTLET How many? LEO Tens of thousands. BARTLET That's the live cattle. What about the beef? LEO Well, FSIS will do a Class One recall and get it off the shelves. Not that they need to. Nobody's gonna buy beef for a couple of years. BARTLET That's a hundred and fifty billion dollar industry. What's the West going to do for a living? LEO Well this generation of ranchers is done. They won't get back on their feet. BARTLET People have known about this disease; they're still eating beef in record numbers. LEO That's cause it's been on the other side of the ocean. Once we announce a positive, steak houses are done. Fast food is done. BARTLET And then the corn and soybean growers, right? LEO The dominos don't end on this. BARTLET Any good news? LEO For fishermen. BARTLET So we've got frightened parents, rising food prices, public panic, massive layoffs, and something we've never had to worry about before, we're wondering when the next case is gonna happen. The most costly disruptions... LEO Yeah? BARTLET Always happen when something we take completely for granted stops working for a minute. LEO Yeah. BARTLET [sighs] Okay. LEO [as they both get up and he starts to leave] Thank you, Mr. President. BARTLET Oh, hey - do you know when we passed the Clean Water Act? LEO No. BARTLET How could you not know that? LEO My water's clean, I don't ask questions. BARTLET What'd I just say? LEO I wasn't really listening. BARTLET [as they exit the Oval Office] All right. LEO Thank you. Bartlet walks over to Charlie's desk. Charlie stops working and looks up. CHARLIE Yes, sir? BARTLET Nope, nothing. Bartlet goes behind Charlie's area and takes a book off the shelf. CHARLIE You sure there's nothing you need? BARTLET No. Bartlet pauses and watches Charlie working. BARTLET You know, Charlie... CHARLIE [quickly] Yeah... BARTLET History can't be reduced to dates and names. CHARLIE Well, I'm pretty sure this final can. BARTLET Nah. I'm starting you out with a copy of the speech George Perkins March used in 1845 to rouse the agricultural community of Rutland, Vermont. Then you're going to need to study on the word "ecology," as coined by the German biologist Ernst Heikl. CHARLIE Am I being punished for something? BARTLET [walking back to the Oval] Better in the original German, of course, but obviously the translation will be fine. CHARLIE [muttering to himself] Good. CUT TO: INT. THE WHITE HOUSE LOBBY - DAY Sam and two men meet. SAM Hey. TOM STARKS Sam MAN Sam, how you doing? [They shake hands.] SAM Good. Thanks for coming down. Come on back. MAN So I got a funny joke the President could do about telling people not to wear seatbelts. SAM Well he didn't tell people not to wear their seatbelts. MAN He should say, "Maybe I should go back to concealing my health." SAM [pausing] That's a good one. He can use it at the Rotary Club. TOM By the way, Josh Lyman shouldn't make jokes about Rotarians. They're good people. They reach SAM'S OFFICE. SAM He feels bad about that. TOM They volunteer their time even though nobody's got enough of it. SAM He's gonna apologize. TOM I'm a Rotarian. My dad's a Rotarian. SAM My dad's an Elk. TOM Elks are okay. SAM So. Anticipating this might become a thing, I wanted to float the idea of a national seatbelt law. What's the Democratic Leadership going to say? MAN They're gonna say no. SAM Why? MAN Well, first of all, the Democratic Leadership doesn't do damage control for the President. SAM Well, you know, I think it's about more than damage control. Only 68% of drivers are wearing their seatbelts. We get that up to 90% and we save 5,000 lives a year. MAN And if we get kids to eat their spinach, they'll be as strong as Popeye. TOM We've done driver safety. We've done food drives. We've done physical fitness. SAM Who? TOM The Rotary Club. SAM He really is gonna apologize, Tom. MAN Sam... SAM Look, secondary seatbelt laws don't work. You can only fine someone if you've stopped them for something else. Isn't it time for a tough law? MAN To make up for a bonehead comment at a fundraiser? TOM The governors don't like it. It's federalism run amok. SAM The governors don't have a vote in Congress. TOM But the Congressmen do, and they're not going to vote for it either. SAM Okay, well then, this is a shorter meeting than I thought it would be. Thanks. TOM You won't catch a Rotarian not wearing a seatbelt. An Elk, maybe. SAM Yeah. CUT TO: INT. JOSH'S OFFICE - DAY Donna walks in, going through some papers. JOSH Yeah? DONNA Leo's office wanted you to know that the OMB's gonna do a quick report on expanding unfunded mandates and it doesn't mean anything but they're doing it anyway. JOSH My tax dollars hard at work. DONNA [leaving] I'll be at my desk. JOSH Say Donna, you've worked as a prostitute. DONNA [turning back] Yeah? JOSH Let's just say. DONNA Okay. JOSH Why should what you do be against the law? DONNA Well, in this country you're not allowed to buy and sell people. JOSH You're not selling yourself, you're renting out your body. DONNA You're not allowed to do that either. JOSH Don't fashion models do it every day? DONNA It's different. JOSH It's only different because we say it's different. When you get a massage, isn't it just a matter of degrees? DONNA Lots of things are just a matter of degrees. JOSH Wouldn't legalizing prostitution allow women to unionize and get access to social services and health care benefits and create some control over the industry? DONNA You think if you make prostitution legal then prostitutes are going to suddenly want every one to know they're prostitutes? JOSH [pausing] Hmm. DONNA What? JOSH The rare valid point. DONNA [pointing towards the door] I'll be back on my street corner. CUT TO: INT. THE MURAL ROOM - DAY Toby enters and greets three USF veterans. TOBY Okay, round two. I'm Toby Ziegler, I'll be your referee. BARNEY LANG [shaking his hand] Toby, I'm Barney Lang, National Commander. We spoke on the phone. TOBY Yes. BARNEY Please meet Ed Ramsey and Ronald Crookshank. These are two of our regional directors. TOBY Welcome to the White House. They all sit down. RONALD CROOKSHANK Been here before. My unit was invited by Franklin Roosevelt. [pointing towards Toby] That chair used to be over there. [pointing to the corner of the room] TOBY It's nice to meet you. BARNEY Toby, before we get started, could I hit you up for a personal favor? TOBY I don't think the President is available for pictures today, but I can check. BARNEY No, it's my buddy, Arthur Holly. He's been in a wheelchair cause he lost his left leg; and the wheelchair is falling apart. We've been doing a pretty good job with duct tape, but the guy could really use a new one, and Medicaid is dragging its feet on this. TOBY Leave me his information on a piece of paper. I can make a phone call for you. BARNEY I appreciate that, son. Thank you. TOBY Okay. Tell me the point you find most offensive and would like to see pulled from the exhibit. ED RAMSEY Well there are a number of points. TOBY What's at the top of the list? BARNEY Sections that have the overreaching message of a vengeful America and a victimized Japan. TOBY Well you don't want to ignore the effects of the bomb. ED We don't want to ignore facts. But in that particular case we don't agree with their version of the facts. TOBY The 63,000? C.J. open the door and slips in unnoticed. ED They say 63,000 American lives would have been lost if we had invaded. Marshall told Truman that a ground offensive would take the lives of at least 250,000. TOBY Well there's some evidence to suggest that Marshall told Truman that and some estimates say 150,000. Some say 268,000. C.J. There are discrepancies. C.J. had just walked in. Toby, a bit startled, turns and looks at her. TOBY I didn't see you there. C.J. approaches the group and they all stand. TOBY This is C.J. Cregg. BARNEY I'm Barney Lang. Ed Ramsey, Ronald Crookshank. C.J. Good to meet you. TOBY You need anything? C.J. I just came by to listen. TOBY [turning back to the veterans] Before I forget, I want to put you three in a room with the exhibit directors from the Smithsonian. Can I do it today? BARNEY Sure. TOBY Stay by a phone. [They start up as to leave.] Okay. C.J. Can I interrupt for a second, Toby? TOBY Yeah. C.J. Mr. Ramsey, I saw on your information you were in the 10th Armored Division. ED Private first class, 10th Armored Division, 3rd Army, second World War. C.J. You fought in the battle of the bulge, sir. ED Yes, I did. My unit broke through the German Seventh Army's buffer, which was critical in winning. That was the moment we beat the Nazis on the western front. C.J. That was a hell of a moment. She sits, and the others do too. ED I have a granddaughter like you. She's a chemist. C.J. Can I ask you to imagine something? ED I suppose. C.J. Imagine if you weren't as successful as you were. Imagine, say, that Hitler had taken Antwerp and we'd lost the Battle of the Bulge and Germany held the western front. ED It wouldn't have mattered. The Russians crushed them on the eastern front. They wouldn't have won the war. C.J. No, but even if the Russians had kicked them out of Poland, Hungary, Bulgaria, they could have held onto France, maybe kept Italy, certainly they could have defended Germany. ED Yeah. C.J. Now it's six decades later, and while they didn't conquer Europe the Nazis exist as a recognized government in some small corner of the European union. ED That would never have happened. C.J. Really? ED They killed a quarter of my unit. They killed a third of my classmates from Erasmus High School. While the veteran is speaking, Toby watches C.J. intently. ED We never would have allowed it-- C.J. We did it in Cambodia. TOBY C.J., knock it off. C.J. You're protesting because you think the Smithsonian isn't paying proper respect to what you and the soldiers of the 10th Armored, 3rd Army risked and lost your lives for six decades ago. How would you feel, in the hypothetical I just described, if I told you that at my press briefing at the end of the day I was announcing that we were selling tanks, missiles, and fighter jets to the Nazis? TOBY Excuse me. [whispering to C.J. and standing] Step outside. C.J. walks out behind him. When they reach the HALLWAY, Toby starts. TOBY Look... C.J. You know, if I was living in Qumar I wouldn't be able to say "Shove it up your ass, Toby." But since I'm not, shove it up your ass, Toby. Toby stands in a trail of dust as C.J. chalks one up for the sisterhood and walks on. FADE OUT. END ACT THREE * * * ACT FOUR FADE IN: EXT. THE WHITE HOUSE PORTICO - DAY Bartlet and Sam are walking outside. BARTLET You really wanna talk about the lawsuit in Colorado? SAM Yes, sir. BARTLET You hear about the lawyer who opened a chain of dry cleaners? "Press your lawsuit while you wait?" [pause] There was a better joke in there someplace, right? SAM Probably not. Two Secret Service members open the doors to the OUTER OVAL OFFICE. Sam and Bartlet enter. SAM Sir-- BARTLET Doctrine of Sovereign Immunity. You can't sue the king. We brought it over from England. SAM Yeah, but he's not immune from the court of public opinion. BARTLET Forgot to bring that one over. They enter THE OVAL OFFICE. Charlie is standing at Bartlet's desk, looking at papers. SAM The RNC'll have a press conference. BARTLET The RNC has a press conference when I sneeze. SAM I think we need to come out for a strong national seatbelt law. BARTLET Congress won't pass it. He walks behind his desk and begins to sign papers. Charlie walks to another spot in the room. SAM I'm not saying we need to have a law. I'm just saying we need to come out for it. It'll end the question of where you stand. BARTLET People know where I stand. If they don't know, they can ask me. SAM You were governor of New Hampshire, sir, the only state-- BARTLET And I was for it then. Never did anything about it because nobody wanted it. And, frankly, why waste time in Capitol? SAM C.J.'ll get asked about it at the five o'clock briefing. BARTLET I can't be responsible every time somebody irrationally twists my meaning. People are responsible for themselves. Bartlet walks over to Charlie and hands him a folder. Charlie hands Bartlet another folder, then walks away. Bartlet walks over to Sam. BARTLET Today's cars are safer than they've ever been. They've all got air bags, they've all got seatbelts, and they're all crash tested from here to Tuesday. All that's left is personal behavior and bad luck, and, I'm not responsible for either one. And, Sam, if Mrs. Landingham w as here right now, she'd say the exact same thing. You know what I'm saying? SAM Yes, sir. BARTLET I don't blame this woman for suing me. I'm not a king, and I'm not sure the law should treat me like one. Though certainly for the moment I don't mind. I'm not blaming her. She's got to go someplace with her grief and her anger. The ones who should be horsewhipped with a horsewhip are the ones exploiting her grief for political gain, and I'm not getting down with those guys. SAM Yes, sir. BARTLET [walks back to behind his desk] Let Congress pass that law. I'll sign it. CHARLIE Sir? BARTLET [to Charlie] Yeah, let's go. Get Leo. SAM Thank you, Mr. President. [turns and walks out of the office] BARTLET Thank you. Toby and Josh enter. TOBY Good evening, Mr. President. BARTLET Isn't there a joke to be had with lawsuits and dry cleaners? I've been working on it all day. JOSH You've been working on other stuff though too, right? BARTLET Yeah. C.J. and Leo enter. C.J. Good evening, sir. BARTLET Hey. LEO Okay. BARTLET Okay, what do we think? When do you tell the public what you know? C.J. I think it's right now. TOBY And I think it's when you know something. I think absolute confirmation has to be the rule when we're talking about public panic. JOSH Are we sure there's gonna be public panic if we're only saying there's a chance? We think maybe, usually it's negative. TOBY I do. 'Cause we're not talking about sushi, it's hamburgers. I'm not kidding around, it's... these things. The everyday things. The everyday American things. The 99 cent things that, when you suddenly have to be afraid of them, strike at the center of our equilibrium. LEO I'll tell you what else. Democrats aren't exactly loved by the beef industry to begin with. We're gonna get killed for causing false panic. C.J. Yeah, what we say now is gonna be measured against the facts, the consequenses of which will be far worse if we don't say anything and it goes the other way. TOBY I disagree. C.J. [to Toby] Then pretend for a moment that the cow has MS. A pause. Everyone turns and looks at C.J. TOBY No, I don't think I will. BARTLET [to Leo] Something going on with them? LEO I think they can hear you. They're standing right in front of you. C.J. That was a bad analogy, I apologize. What I meant was that the public will not forgive a President who withheld information that could have helped them or saved lives. Second, in a crisis, people need to feel like soldiers, not victims. Third, information breeds confidence. Silence breeds fear. That's my argument. Toby, Josh, and Leo all turn to Bartlet. BARTLET [pause] If it comes from the President-- TOBY It shouldn't come from the President. LEO It shouldn't even come from the White House. JOSH It should come from Health and Human Services. LEO How about the secretary, mid-level? BARTLET All right, that's what we'll do then. LEO, JOSH, and C.J. Thank you, sir. They all turn to exit. BARTLET Toby. Toby turns back aorund. BARTLET What's going on with the Smithsonian? TOBY It'll be fine, sir. Leo, Josh, and C.J. exit. C.J. closes the door behind her. Charlie enters. BARTLET Where are you leading them? He walks out from behind his desk and to Toby. Charlie goes through papers on Bartlet's desk and watches Bartlet and Toby. TOBY Not to turn a blind eye to the dark points of history, for sure, but I think there's a time and place for that, and this isn't it. BARTLET You're changing. TOBY No, I'm not. BARTLET Yes, you are. TOBY A very, very little bit. BARTLET Okay. TOBY Uh, Mr. President? Could you point me in the right direction on something? One of the vets who was here has a buddy whose wheelchair's falling apart. Who can get something done overnight at Medicaid? BARTLET Ah, Toby. We've gotta straighten out Medicaid. TOBY Yeah. BARTLET You know, after the Civil War, veterans had to come to D.C. to get their pensions? They had to visit the office personally. They waited for a clerk to look through all the Civil War records until their papers were found. You know what their papers were bound with? TOBY No. BARTLET Red tape. That's where it comes from. TOBY I didn't know that. BARTLET Go and apologize to C.J. for whatever you did. He puts his hand on Toby's shoulder and starts to walk him out of the office. TOBY I didn't do anything. BARTLET Like that matters. TOBY Thank you, sir. [exits] BARTLET What's next? He looks up at Charlie, who is staring at him. BARTLET What? CHARLIE You know, sir, that story about red tape and Medicaid was interesting, but... BARTLET What? [checks his watch and walks over to Charlie] CHARLIE Nothing. I'm sorry, you've got economic advisors in the Roosevelt Room. BARTLET It was interesting, but what? CHARLIE But the man just wanted a wheelchair. Toby's trying to get him a wheelchair. BARTLET I forgot. CHARLIE Yes. BARTLET Hey, I forgot. Get the information from Toby, I'll make the call myself. Bartlet walks behind his desk and Charlie walks out from behind it. CHARLIE Maybe the man can wheel himself around on a book by German biologist Ernst Heikl. BARTLET Get the information. Get the director of the CMSO on the phone. CHARLIE Yes, sir. He starts to walk out. Bartlet looks at the papers on his desk for a few moments before looking back up at Charlie. BARTLET 1972. CHARLIE [stops walking and turns around] I'm sorry, sir? BARTLET Is when we passed the Clean Water Act. CHARLIE Thank you, sir. BARTLET You know nothing about the Visigoths. CHARLIE Yes, sir. BARTLET And I know everything. CHARLIE Yes, sir. Charlie turns and walks out of the office. CUT TO: EXT. DUPONT SPORTS AND FITNESS - NIGHT Josh is standing outside. Amy comes out of the building. JOSH Hey. AMY What are you doing here? They begin to walk down the street together. JOSH I went up to your office, and they said you were here. Eleanor Roosevelt once made a speech to the UN General Assembly saying that we should decriminalize prostitution. AMY Eleanor Roosevelt was the one who liked hats, right? JOSH [looks at Amy] The Undersecretary for Global Affairs and Regina Pierce are gonna sit with our legal advisor at the UN and look at some alternative language. AMY I heard. JOSH So. AMY Indeed. JOSH That's right. AMY Are you walking me back to my office? JOSH How's making prostitution illegal not supressing women's rights? AMY How is making heroin use illegal not supressing a heroin user's rights? They stop walking. JOSH It is, but heroin's bad for you. AMY So's being a prostitute. JOSH How am I not supposed to call you a hypocrite when you say that the government shouldn't tell women what to do with their bodies. AMY Exercise some self-control, I guess. They begin walking again. AMY Prostitution is about the subjugation of women by men for profit. JOSH But the profit goes to the women. AMY In some cases. But I know of no little girl, and neither do you, who says "I wanna be a prostitute when I grow up." They do it 'cause they're forced to out of economic circumstances. And dire economic need is a form of coersion. JOSH But the guys who breaks into my apartment and steals my stereo does it for the same reason. AMY And he's going to jail. JOSH Yeah, because he broke into my apartment and stole my stereo, and nobody wants that to happen to them. But you can't say that about the other thing. CUT TO: INT. WOMEN'S LEADERSHIP COALITION - CONTINUOUS Amy and Josh step off the elevator. AMY J... JOSH Forget, for a second, that it's a women's issue. The law isn't a deterrent. Prostitutes advertise in the yellow pages. Amy picks up mail from the main desk, reading it as they walk to her office AMY J... JOSH Aren't we just serving to create more criminals in a criminal environment? AMY Josh? JOSH Yes? AMY Why did you come here? JOSH To tell you about the thing. AMY The UN? JOSH Yeah. AMY I'd heard. JOSH I didn't know that. AMY Why didn't you call? JOSH I'm sorry? Amy hands the mail to a woman seated at a desk near her office. AMY Why didn't you call me on the phone? JOSH Your office is on the way home. They enter AMY'S OFFICE. AMY It's five o'clock. JOSH Yeah. AMY [takes her jacket off] You go home at five o'clock? JOSH I just stopped by. Amy walks over to her desk and turns on a light. She picks up a piece of paper and sits on the edge of her desk, reading the paper. AMY Are you dating your assistant? JOSH No. AMY [looks up at him] I heard you might be. JOSH I'm not. AMY She's cute. JOSH She's my assistant. AMY Are you dating Joey Lucas? JOSH No. AMY She's not your assistant. JOSH I know. Amy looks back down at the paper, then stands up and walks behind her desk. AMY You know the thing with guys like you? JOSH Why are we talking about this? AMY [sits] 'Cause you stopped by. JOSH I'm a visible guy. People say things about me. People write things. And what I do reflects on the President. AMY [smiles] Nice save. JOSH I didn't make that up. AMY Okay. JOSH What's the thing about guys like me? [sits] AMY [stares at him for a moment] Hmm? JOSH [smiles] What's the thing with guys like me? AMY [smiles at him, pause] You wanna get hit over the head? JOSH [long pause] I have to go. AMY See ya. Josh exits. Amy smiles. CUT TO: EXT. WLC BUILDING - CONTINUOUS Josh walks out. He sees a taxi and starts to walk towards the street. JOSH Taxi! He walks quickly towards the taxi. A water balloon suddenly falls to the ground right by his right leg. JOSH What the hell?! From the balcony a few stories above, Amy yells at him. AMY It was a water balloon! JOSH [yells up to her] What are you, fifteen years old? You almost hit me in the head! Amy smiles. Josh stares at her for a moment before a look of realization suddenly comes over his face. Amy waves to him and walks out of sight. Josh walks away. CUT TO: INT. C.J.'S OFFICE - NIGHT C.J. is walking down the hall to her office, pinning her hair up, getting ready for her briefing. She enters her office to see Nancy McNally standing by her desk. ANNOUNCER [OS] Will you take your seats please? The briefing will begin in a few moments. Please take your seats. C.J. Hey Nancy. NANCY I understand you're troubled by the arms sale. C.J. walks to behind her desk. She begins going through papers. NANCY The Nazis were a bad analogy. We're not fighting a war with Qumar. C.J. Well, this isn't the point, but we will. Of course we will. Of course we'll be fighting a war with Qumar one day, and you know it, so...well, at least we'll be familiar with the weapons they're using. NANCY We need Khalifa Airbase. We refuel there, and we keep air radar. C.J. We don't need it, it's convenient. NANCY C.J.-- C.J. We don't need it. We've got Turkey, we've got Bahraine, we've got Deigo Garcia. Qumar's convenient. NANCY Yes, it's convenient. C.J. They beat women, Nancy. They hate women. The only reason they keep Qumari women alive is to make more Qumari men. NANCY So what do you want me to do about it? C.J. How about instead of suggesting that we sell the guns to them, suggesting that we shoot the guns at them? And by the way, not to change the subject, but how are we supposed to have any moral credibility when we talk about gun control and making sure that guns don't get in the hands of the wrong people? God, Nancy! What the hell are we defining as the right people? NANCY This is the real world, and we can't isolate our enemies. C.J. I know about the real world, and I'm not suggesting we isolate them. NANCY You're suggesting we eliminate them. C.J. I have a briefing. She picks up her folder and walks out of the office to the Press Room. Nancy follows. NANCY You're suggesting that-- C.J. I'm not suggesting anything. I don't suggest foreign policy around here. NANCY You are right now. C.J. It's the twenty-first century, Nancy. The world's gotten smaller. I don't know how we can tolerate this kind of suffering anymore, particularly when all it does is continue the cycle of anti-American hatred. But that's not the point, either. NANCY What's the point? They stop walking. C.J. The point is that apartheid was an Easthampton clambake compared to what we laughingly refer to as the life these women lead. And if we had sold M1-A1s to South Africa fifteen years ago, you'd have set the building on fire. Thank God we never needed to refuel in Johannesburg! NANCY [nods] It's a big world, C.J. And everybody has guns, and I'm doing the best I can. C.J. [in tears] They're beating the women, Nancy! A pause. Nancy looks at C.J., then turns and walks away. C.J. stands at the door to the Press Room for several moments, trying to compose herself, then enters the room. CUT TO: INT. PRESS ROOM - CONTINUOUS C.J. walks in. The reporters all take their seats as C.J. walks to the podium. C.J. Good evening. We have two birthdays today, so we have cake. One cake. It's nice to share. Quickly, before I take questions, a late edition to Monday's schedule, the President will be at the opening of the Smithsonian exhibit commemorating the sixtieth anniversary of the attack on Pearl Harbor. That's three in the afternoon, and I'll have more information Monday morning. Labor Secretary Carl Reed will brief from this podium in one hour's time on our school-to-work initiative, and, let me check, yeah, while that's going on, there'll be a briefing at the Department of Health and Human services by USDA director David Rhinegold. Sometime Tuesday you'll be briefed at the Pentagon. The DOD will be annoucing that we've renewed our lease another ten years with the Khalifa Airbase in Qumar. I understand they've promised to paint and add new carpet. A few reporters laugh at her comment. C.J. A delegation from... She looks up to see Toby at the back of the room. He crosses his hands over his heart. C.J. [cont.] ...state and the UN will be sitting down to go over some last-minute language for Vienna, and for that trip we'll have your schedules ready middle part of next week. Who's got questions? Several reporters begin asking questions about C.J.'s words. DISSOLVE TO: END TITLES. FADE TO BLACK. THE END * * * The West Wing and all its characters are a property of Aaron Sorkin, John Wells Production, Warner Brothers Television, and NBC. No copyright infringement is intended. Episode 3.08 -- "The Women of Qumar" Original Airdate: November 28, 2001, 9:00 PM EST Transcript By: Lisa, Irene, Ramius and Musicczar July 12, 2002